Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Fine Time To Question. Well, For The Fun Of It

Ahhh Life. I have five questions... I'll put my answers in too:

1) It doesn't matter if married or single or unattached: What is your idea of a great date?

Hmm... I guess it depends on who I'm with. I can't really talk about my ex because my opinion of her is skewed. And not in a positive way. Ha! So if it was a first date with someone, I'd like to just catch a movie (preferrably a comedy) dinner, and maybe go catch a good band somewhere. If money was tight, then I'd say make the most of it: dinner at home (candles are always good!), a great movie, and favorite music on the stereo to enjoy with someone. Dancing optional...

2) If you're watching a movie with someone, what type of movie would you prefer to watch?

I am a big mush when it comes to this... I like romantic comedies when I'm involved with someone. Otherwise, just an action comedy will do...

3) What is more important to you on a day off... going out to 'play', or sleeping in?

Sleep! absolutely! I used to be a light sleeper. Maybe 4 hours at most... NOT ANYMORE! Ha!

4) You're stranded on a deserted island. If you could pick any one Hollyweird (hollywood) person to be stranded with, who would it be and why?

Probably Sandra Bullock. She's almost normal which in hollyweird, is very, very rare. Most people would pick someone of the opposite sex because of some romantic fantasy. Me, I wouldn't say that she's a romantic fantasy so much as she seems like a normal person who would be cool to just hang out with.

5) If money were no object, what one toy would you buy for yourself? Not for someone else, but for yourself...

I'm boring. I'd pick a really decked out house on the water... Of course the cost of the utilities would probably be brutal... but hey, it's dreaming, isn't it?

Monday, February 27, 2006

A Family Biography... A Family Geography

My few days of vacation are now over so it's back to work I go... I am so happy or could you tell? I showed up to work and when my boss saw me, decided to ask me about how I was doing. Of course she wanted to know how I was about a variety of things... I was still smarting over the weekend waterworks at my father's place. I am feeling a wee bit better. I went over there after work tonight and checked out how the flooring was... it was dry. Cold but dry. I was very happy about that. I hope things will work out. I've already got enough on my plate with other things. Went and saw my sister tonight. She's doing a lot better as she is making progress from having a major part of her foot amputated. She is going to get fitted for special shoe so that she can walk normally. She's looking forward to that. I was talking with my nephew about college. He is talking about 3 different schools where he might go. One local school here, one a moderate distance away, and one way down south. I'm hoping he'll go somewhere close where I can go see him play football. We'll see what happens.
I'm sitting here now and letting random thoughts go through my head... I am getting less than excited to meet my future brother in law. Not because I don't like him. To the contrary, I think very highly of him. But he's from Tennessee and when he comes up here in another week or so, he's going to want me to help him put another roof on my other sister's house... in the middle of winter... oh joy! He and my sister met online. She is a cancer survivor (so is he) and they met in a chat room. Normally, I am very hesitant about online dating etc, because you don't know who's out there. This one actually worked. She's 47 and he's 56... So I didn't say much because they are both adults and a little older so they can make their own decisions. They took their time (over two years) and really got along well... He's been up several times and is a gentleman. My family put him through the 'interrogation'... and he passed with flying colors. He's a forest park ranger so I am happy for the two of them. They've talked rings. I'm all for it. The biggest problem my sister has is that she doesn't want to leave her family and friends here in Ohio. But I think she knows that if they're going to make it work, she would be better served if she moved down to Tennessee. But we'll see what happens there... Good for them. I could write more but I think I'll just call it a night and tuck myself in for the evening... nighty night.

Sunday, February 26, 2006

An Olympic Finnish... How Swede it is...

My oh my,
That's about all I can muster. Tired doesn't seem to be the word to describe what I feel right now. I want to nod off and enjoy some slumber but too many things are going through my head at the moment. What a weekend! It got off to a horrible start as I walked into my father's place and that was flooded because of a water line break. My heart is still very heavy thinking about that. I know that won't be cheap. It couldn't have come at a worst time, what with the brakes on my car, the flat tire, etc... I know there are worse things going on in the world, but I could've done without the stress. No sense complaining about it because I can't change it. Like my favorite preacher Joyce Meyer says "there is no drive thru for your breakthrough. The only way out is through!" So there!
The Toledo Cherokee added some happiness to my weekend though. They beat Columbus last night 9-2 last night and 6-2 today to go from 5th place back into a tie for third. After today's win, there was a 'skate with the Cherokee', as fans got to go on the ice and skate with the players. I went down there and hung out with the players for a spell, then decided I was too cold and opted to go home. Stopped by the grocery store to get some soda and after a quick pit stop at Taco Hell for some dinner, I came home to watch the closing ceremonies of the Olympics. I was kind of torn as to who to root for in the Gold Medal Hockey game as one of my new friends Ophelia is from Finland. One of the Cherokee hockey players calls Jonkoping, Sweden home. I had fun picking on Jesper after the Swedes won the game 3-2. His country won the Olympic gold but the three goal scorers for Sweden all play here in the USA for the Detroit Red Wings, a team that Jesper despises. I had to chide him a bit about that in the locker room. "Hey Jesper! I see where the Red Wings won the gold medal..." Jesper immediately cracked a smile, and uttered an expletive which I won't repeat and continued to boast how Sweden has the best hockey team in the world. My only comment back to him was "Uh, Jess... half of your country is OVER HERE playing hockey. They only go back home for international competitions but speak better english over here than the native yanks do..." Jesper laughed and let out another expletive at me (in good fun) and we both laughed about it all.
Now I'm sitting here at the computer and wondering what does my future hold. Will I be able to get the pipes fixed in a timely manner? How will I take care of everything that's on my plate right now? Can I keep up? Maybe I need yet another job? Yikes, I'm ready to drop... I'm going to bed... g'night all...

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Anything BUT Zzzzz...

I've gone from ho-hum to being mad at the world... I went back to check my late father's place and it was flooded with water from a waterline burtsting due to the cold. My head is so full of frustration right now but I am trying to keep my composure. I still have to go broadcast a hockey game online. I had the water company come and shut the water off from the curb and I tried to mop up as much of the water as I could and have the fan on to try and dry out the floor. I didn't need this right now.
I came home to get ready to go to the game and have the TV on right now. I watched the Czech Republic beat the Russians in the Bronze medal game and Jackson if you read this I hope you can appreciate that I left home later than I was supposed to (to go to the arena), because I was glued to the UK-LSU basketball game... Wow! I love college basketball this time of the year.
Well, I suppose I will write more tonight when I get home from the hockey game. I've got to head out to the rink and get ready go on the air... you all have a great evening (or whatever time of day depending on what part of the world you're on) and we'll talk soon...

God Bless,

Friday, February 24, 2006


Today... It was a day that... well, a day that saw me do absolutely nothing. A big happy birthday to Ophelia. I hope that you enjoyed your day Opehlia... Your country's Olympic hockey team gave you a nice gift in the form of a huge win over Russia. Happy Birthday and many more... I'm enjoying some time off from work and doing a little traveling, some putzing around... doing nothing of particular importance. I have to get back on the job tomorrow night though as the Cherokee are home for a 7pm face-off with Columbus. I'll be broadcasting online and hope that we win. We need the points to finish in the top four and get home ice advantage in the first round of the playoffs. The season is winding down and the serious part of the season will begin in 3 weeks... the playoffs! When hockey season is over, I don't get much time off at all as I will switch sports over to women's football... Yep, that season will go from April to June... I am looking forward to the travel when that season begins... ha! Well, to be truthful, I really do enjoy road games more than home games. I like sleeping in hotels and eating lousy food. Honest. I like the road. I travel quite a bit throughout the midwest of the U.S. from September through June... I guess that's the nomad in me. Maybe that's why I'm not married yet. I like to travel too much... but instead of traditional travel of planes, trains and automobiles, I see the country either in team buses or if I drive myself, I can think and clear my head without having to be chatty with everyone else... I love stopping in small towns when I drive and eat in local small restaurants to listen to the locals talk about what's going on in their world... If I'm driving back from St. Louis or Peoria or Cincinnati, I like to go on the unbeaten path to see what's out there... That's half of the fun of getting to know this country I call home... gotta luv it.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Being Pensive...sort of

Sometimes I go through a day where nothing of note really happens. Today was one of those days. I can't say that I really did anything important. The only really notable accomplishment for me today was that I loaded all of my broadcast software onto the laptop that I bought. My ex has my other laptops that had things wrong with them and she fixed them. But when we split up, she kept them for herself. When I asked for them back, she freaked and accused me of more drivel that wasn't true. So I prayed on it and decided that she must've needed them more than me. So I let go and I got another one for cheap and am going on with my life. Or at least I'm trying to. I wrote something tonight. I was just in the mood to write with music in my head and I wrote down some lyrics for it... the sad part is... I can't play or read a note! Ha! How's that for impressive songwriting skills??? But I can hum and whistle the heck out of my songs... LOL... I had this in my head and wrote it down...

There are some days when I look to the sky
I think about the past and I wonder why
When all seems lost and I feel like I can't cope
I can feel you there and you give me a sense of hope

That's why I stand on your name
Others can laugh but I feel no shame
When all seems hopeless and lost
I know the love you gave and how much it cost

When my day seems to go on for oh so long
And I come home alone and I don't feel that strong
I lie awake at night when it seems like it won't end
I Wish the sun would rise so I can do it all again

But then I realized that you've been there too
Nothing compares to all that you've gone through
And through it all, you've never abandoned me
You've been there without a complaint just for me

That's why I stand on your name
Others can laugh but I feel no shame
When all seems hopeless and lost
I know the love you gave and how much it cost

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Frozen Toezen

It was nice to know that I wasn't alone in the way I was feeling yesterday. Big time thank yous for showing concern and care you guys... I had today off from work but went out of town to visit a friend. We spent the day helping the installers put in his new fireplace and then afterwards, me, him and his wife and the kids went to dinner at some very nice Italian bistro for which I was way underdressed... (I was in a sweatshirt and jeans)... It didn't matter, we had a very relaxing dinner. Just what I needed. Tried to do some work on my computer but it decided it needed a vacation too. I just got home and am very tired and the best thing is that I have tomorrow off from work too... I am, quite possibly, the happiest man on planet earth. Just being able to get some much needed sleep is exciting to think about. Getting excited over sleep... now that is a sure sign of old age, isn't it? I can't wait for spring to get here. I live at a lake (Lake Erie) and took a stroll on the pier today. It is so relaxing to do that but when it's ice cold and the wind is blowing into your face from off of the lake, it makes it a bit difficult to truly appreciate nature and it's splendor. Instead, all I'm thinking is "what in the world am I doing out here?" Only closely followed by:other random questions: "who invented liquid soap and why? Is it okay to yell 'movie' in a crowded firehouse? Why am I standing outside near the water, freezing my poop chute off and thinking about crap like this when I could be inside my house being nice and toasty warm???" Yes, I am a dork!

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

A Pity Party

I guess I'm in a bit of a snotty mood. So forgive me for that right off the top. I had a borish day at work so that wasn't the problem. I don't know. I left work, went to a funeral home to pay my respects to a good friend of mine who lost her mom. She threw her arms around me and was so greatful and touched by me stopping by. I talked with her and her husband for a bit and then headed for home. I just don't know what it is... well, maybe I do... I've had to go through losing three friends who impacted me in my work life since the beginning of this year... and we're not even two months in to 2006 yet!!! I keep thinking about Tanner (from hockey), John, and Steve (from the hospital) and I wonder what in the world is going on? But then I start to get mad at myself because I know there are others out there who have lost loved ones much closer than I have. Those who have lost spouses. Those who have lost a child. Those people are suffering much deeper and it is when I think about them, that I feel so ridiculous for having a pity party for myself. I guess I'm ticked off... Not at God, not at my friends... I'm all kinds of cheesed off at death. I'm fed up with death... I know that it is a part of life... But I hate death! The only way I know how to get back at death is to try and embrace life and live it... my thinking is that when I am feeling sorry for myself about losing those that I've lost, then death wins. But when I choose to embrace life and place my focus on what is good about life, then I feel like I'm telling death to take a hike... I guess maybe I needed to get something off my chest... Sometimes I start writing about one thing, then out of nowhere... I go off about something I wasn't expecting to... SO THERE!!! I think I actually feel a little bit better... I'm such a dork!

Monday, February 20, 2006

Monday Musings...

Whew! Am I beat. I am sooo tired right now. I had a long day at work which actually went pretty well. My boss took the day off so that is always nice when the supervisor isn't there. After work, I went to the hospital education center because they were having a memorial service for a good friend that was taken from us way too soon. Dr Steve Snedden was being remembered the way he would've wanted... with laughter. His wife and children were there and while it was hard to talk about how much we all miss him, the stories that were told had a lot of us laughing hysterically and that did wonders for everyone. Typical hospital humor. Very dark, but gut-wrenchingly funny. Since there were bigwigs at the service, much of it had to be sanitized for their protection... But it was a fitting tribute to a really good man... We miss you Steve. Afterwards, we went outside the education center to enjoy some cheese and crackers and fruit & vegetables etc... I came home to a my house and didn't really feel sad, but rather empty. I wasn't pining for my ex-girlfriend like I had in the past. This time, I just felt empty. So I popped in a cd of one of my favorite preachers and that made me feel better. I am experiencing a real 'guy' moment.... I've got the tv muted but with the Olympics on... and the audio of a hockey game on my computer (Fairbanks vs. Santa Fe) ... and Joyce Meyer preaching in my cd player.... ALL AT THE SAME TIME!!! How weird is that? All that's missing is my radio playing a college basketball game and I'd be all set... HELLLLPPPP!!!! :) ~

Sunday, February 19, 2006

How Things Play Themselves Out...

As I write this entry, my eyes are struggling to stay open. I feel like I could sleep for 20 hours straight, but when I lie down to get some shuteye, I can't fall asleep. Oh well, no sense in complaining. It won't get me anywhere anyway... I woke and had to hurry to get to church which is 30 miles (50 km) away. What is normally a 1/2 an hour's drive was shortened into a 20 minute cruise. I know better, but didn't want to be late. The church I go to is pretty cool. It's a church geared towards 'unchurched' people. Not your grandparents church by any means. I know that I'm in the right place when the church's band onstage, rocks harder than any bar band that I've seen in the last 12 years... and I'm NOT KIDDING!!! I was raised Catholic and I do not (nor will I) say anything bad about that church. It fufills many people. I have many friends that are Catholic. It didn't fufill me. But the place I go to worship now is a place that changed my life greatly. I'm a 41 year-old goof ball who still enjoys acting like a 12 year-old from time to time. And for the first time in my entire life, I actually look forward to going to church. I've been going to my church for over 3 years now and I enjoy it more and more. The first time I walked in to the church, I saw a bunch of volunteers that were greeting people and being extremely helpful... without being pushy. I was expecting a bunch of 'Jesus Freaks' who were going to smile at me and say 'Jesus loves you' and then try to reach for my money. I was expecting to be 'preached at' and be told how awful I was as a sinner. All these notions were destroyed when after hearing the band onstage do a serious kick-butt version of 'Over the hills and far away' from Led Zeppelin... Yeah, you heard me right... LED ZEPPELIN in CHURCH!!! Then after some more conventional contemporary christian fare, there were some video presentations and then the pastor walked out to talk to the people... in blue jeans??? Yep, in jeans... The whole message for that day was about realizing that we are all human. We make mistakes, we feel pain and we all react differently. And the pastor told of numerous examples of how imperfect we are. What convinced me this was the place for me was that he didn't talk about OTHERS who had problems in their private life. Nope, he talked about his OWN. "Just because I am "a pastor" at church does not mean that I don't have a reality that includes personal problems." I've been going there ever since. I've laughed hysterically, I've shed a tear or two. I've been upset, and I've marveled about the wonders of what can happen to a life when all seems lost. I had to take a risk... I had to risk thinking and feeling differently. To allow my heart to be touched and risk being hurt... I don't know about any of you but for sooooo many years, I always associated 'risk' with 'losing' and 'pain' But I've since learned that if you don't risk, you can't laugh, and if you can't laugh, you can't cry. And if you can't cry, then you can't feel. And if you can't feel, You can't really be happy, and if you can't be happy... NOTHING ELSE MATTERS!
My email client decided to take a deuce so those of you that have e-mailed me and wondered why I haven't responded... well... oh happy day... hahahaha....

Saturday, February 18, 2006

A Very Long Day...

I am one tired puppy. I got to bed about 2am and had to be at work by 5:30am this morning. I was happy though because nobody was around so I could wear jeans and a sweat shirt... Had a good day at work and came home and took a nap for a half an hour before I went to the rink to broadcast the game. The Cherokee were just plain awful. We lost to the Motor City Chiefs by a 5-1 score. I was thinking about what kind of headline to use for the press release....

“Cherokee Scalped By Chiefs 5-1”
“Too Many Chiefs, Not Enough Indians”
“Toledo Blows Tribal Battle to Motor City 5-1”
“This Team Whizzes...” (oops, just some personal frustration creeping in... sorry)

Actually, we fell into fourth place with this loss. We play Columbus next weekend and should beat them. At least I hope so... The top four teams get home ice advantage in the playoffs. There's a log jam in the standings. Toledo could end up as high as second, and as low as eighth. No one will catch St. Louis. Ugh! I had a pretty good day today. I thought about my old girlfriend for a few minutes today and it didn't hurt. The longer the time passes, the less I think about her or any other women for that matter. I've been making friends online and I think I just want to take a break from the dating scene for a while and see if I can figure out some things about myself. I've gotten some positive feedback and that's been nice. Instead of trying to be this or that, I just want to BE...Well, I'm going to catch some sleep so I can attempt to get up and go to church in the morning so good night. I hope you all are doing well...

Friday, February 17, 2006

A Tough Start, A Good Finish...

Today didn't start out too well. I woke up and was planning on going out to breakfast. When I went to my car, I had a flat tire. Not a good way to start the day. I was able to get the car over to the gas station just down the street. I put air in the tire and bought a can of fix-a-flat. I drove to work when my brakes decided to poop out and were grinding. Oh perfect! Anyway, I get to work and notice that the tire is flat again. I go into work and only stay half a day. I found someone to work the latter part of my shift and I went back to my car and put in the can of fix-a-flat, and drove the car to get repairs done. Three hours and a couple of hundred dollars later, I head for home. I decided that I was not going to have my day ruined. I am determined to have a good day and realized that I hadn't eaten the entire day so I stopped at a restaurant and enjoyed a very good meal. I also bought another laptop since I am not going to get my other ones back from the ex. I could raise a stink about it, but I consider her as a petty thief minister and nothing more. I am letting go and letting God deal with it all. I am moving forward and am looking forward to it. I've made some new friends online and am feeling good about life. There are still an abundance of challenges that I face, but I am still hopeful that I will overcome and succeed....

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Another Day, Another Story...

Today was oh so nice as I had a day off from work. From all 3 jobs. It sure was nice to veg and do a whole lot of nothing. I did some work for my hockey stuff online and then caught up on emails and stuff. Then I got a text message from my groupie. The groupie is a little ticked at me because she got mad at her sister and her boyfriend and had no one (read: ME) to talk to. So she called me again and complained about lots of things. We finally got to where I needed to direct the conversation to... US... She was not happy with the arrangement of putting some space and distance between us. For the one millionth time, I had to remind her that she is in love with her boyfriend. And that while I find her charming, attractive, smart, and everything else, we both know that if we were to try and be 'friends' with each other and spend time together as such, that we'd take it too far and go over the line. She agreed to that notion. I told her flat out that I was thinking not only of her well-being with Ed, but I was thinking about her emotional stability (something I DON'T have) and I was thinking about HER future. She told me she wishes we could keep our friendship entact. But I know where it would go and I can't chance that for her. Or me, for that matter. I told her we could still talk at work. It's much safer that way. Spent this evening making plans for the weekend... something I haven't done in months.
My Nephew was in NYC for the last week. Got stuck in the snow storm and ended up going to the David Letterman show while he was there. Very cool. I haven't talked to him yet as he just got back into town a few hours ago...Hope this finds you all in good spirits and good health.
God Bless... Mik
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My Intro to Blogger... And to YOU!

Today is day one on blogger as I've spent the last six months on AOL journals with my journal there. My original idea when I first began to journal over on that one was to be topical on a wide variety of subjects. I started on my birthday in July and the very next day, my dad passed away. Not a great start. Then, I got together with a girl who always swore she'd never give me a chance romantically. Well in September, we became a couple. It only lasted two months. She felt my kiss was too hard one morning and said it felt 'forced' and reminded her of her turbulent past. So she broke my heart again. I've spent the last 3 months writing about her and going through my own thoughts and emotions, trying to find the wherewithal to move on. I'm slowly starting to do just that.
My name is Mik, I'm 41 and live in the States. Toledo, Ohio to be precise... Hope to make some new friends as I write about my life... both good and bad... I love sports, I'm also a sports broadcaster (telephone operator by day), but I also like a lot of things that have nothing to do with sports. I am trying to discover more about myself... So hopefully this will be a big part of it. I am going to continue with my aol journal too... BUT, I'll just copy and paste from here so that both have exactly the same content... God Bless and hope to talk to y'all soon...