Highs and Lows

Today is a day of highs and lows. I guess I should backtrack. Yesterday morning, I got my nephew's car fixed. I also noticed that his brakes were questionable. Took care of that too. Went to do a double header of NCAA tennis for the TV station and didn't find out until I got there that it was going to be carried LIVE on the station, not tape-delayed. Well, I had absolutely no time to do anything and had to pee really bad. I ended up holding it for almost three hours. I was at my broadcast position doing the pee-pee dance like nobody's business off-camera. When we went back on camera to close out the broadcast, I had to stand still in front of the camera and talk for three minutes straight. UGH!!! When we (finally) signed off, I could've challenged a track runner with the mad dash I made to the water closet across the parking lot in my suit and tie. I went back over to my sister and nephew's place afterwards to check how things were going and discovered his right tail light was out. So I went and got another one. I love life at this point!
The lows for me concern a dear friend of mine from work, Carolyn. Carolyn is going through a tough time as her husband Doug is in a battle for his life. They went to Mexico a few weeks ago and had a great time. When they came back, Doug began to feel like he had the flu. Went to see the doctor and they put him on anti-biotics. Didn't do anything. He stayed at home in bed and finally called Carolyn at work a couple of days ago to take him to the doctor again. She had him admitted to the hospital and now he's in ICU on a ventilator. He's in critical, but stable condition. They're older than me, but they only got married less than a year ago. Keep them in your prayers okay?
After work today, I've got to head over to the football field and get ready for the Spitfire women's football game against Cincinnati and their coach, Ickey Woods of Cincinnati Bengals fame. He's famous (or infamous, depending on how you look at it) for the 'Ickey Shuffle' dance he did after scoring touchdowns in the NFL. I hope Toledo can at least be competitive and maybe even score some points tonight... what a refreshing change that would be... Ha!

Life... Or Something Like It...

Ahhh Life,
Today seemed like a day that was going to be a lousy one, but actually, turned out to be a pretty good one. I went and tended to several appointments and when I came home, I was surprised to find myself in pretty good spirits. I had to go and check out my nephew's car because one of the hoses was cracked. I couldn't do nothing to fix it because of where it was located. So I am going to go on Friday and take it to a mechanic and get it fixed. He's got his prom this weekend and I'm kind of excited for him... So guess who's paying for his repairs? His mom won't give him a dime and my other sister is already helping him with his prom needs... so I'm going to get his car fixed for him... No one said life was fair. You can pick your friends but you can't pick your family... Sometimes it makes me annoyed but I know that he knows where his help is coming from... So I take some solace in knowing that he appreciates what my other sister does for him.
Went to the Spitfire practice tonight. They looked lackdaisical and not at all into it. I was standing there talking to their owner who's a friend of mine and we talked for over an hour and a half... That part of it was fun. I haven't laughed that much in a while. But laugh I did and can't wait to spend time with them again...

Missing Parts or Persons

I've been trying to figure out just what I'm missing. I'm missing hockey. I'm missing the people associated with hockey. It didn't really hit me until I went to see a minor-league hockey game the other night. I ran into one of my coaches, Brian. Brian is about ten years older than me and was my very favorite coach out of any of them. Brian saw me and flashed that huge grin and went to shake my hand. I gave him such a huge bearhug. He was more than happy to oblige once I hugged him. He and his son were there. His son Kevin was there with some of his friends from high school. Brian and I sat away from them and talked hockey for the better part of two and a half hours. Of course, there were the always eager 'puck bunnies' to gaze at. Brian and I both had to laugh about some of these women who looked like they danced at strip clubs... at least they dressed as such. Not much left to the imagination. Not that I was looking or anything... ha-ha-ha... Anyway, I sat and talked with Brian and it occurred to me how much I missed him. We talked at length about the season, our ride to nationals, his retiring from the Cherokee coaching staff, et-al... It's been quite the wild ride as he told me that my head coach and his other assistant did not go to the big EHK hockey camp last weekend. The only ones to go were our President and assistant goalie coach, who between them, don't know a tremendous deal about how to scout potential players... period. Brian told me that the team is going to be awful this coming year because the EHK tryout camps are where we find a lot of our players. I guess we'll see. Nothing knew elsewhere... I'm starting to do a little more work for BCSN-TV so I'm happy about that. The Toledo Spitfire Women's football team continue to lose so nothing new there... That team has so much potential, but lacks that killer instinct... Last year was referred to as the 'perfect' season... they went 0-8 for the year. It looks like they are going to challenge that mark this season. I hope they find a way to win... they work hard and deserve some success.

You're Getting... Sleeeeeeepy...

I am recouping from the trip. Yep, it was a wonderful weekend before and after Milwaukee. While in Milwaukee, the women's football team, the Toledo Spitfire, got their clocks cleaned to the tune of 42-8... There was a little bit of controversy as the first half ended with Milwaukee up 28-0... apparently there was someone with the Milwaukee's coaching staff who had a walkie talkie and was able to listen in on Toledo's play calling and it led to them shutting Toledo down. Talked with the Spitfire's coaching staff after the game for some time and they said that when Milwaukee comes to Toledo later in the season, they'll have a few 'surprises' instore for the Momentum. Anyway, I got home today and have done nothing but sleep. I woke up and ate some chicken strips and went back to sleep. What kind of party animal am I? hahaha... I'm watching a little bit of the NHL and NBA playoffs for few and I'm going back to bed... Hoping you are all happy and peaceful... if not, be happy and peaceful anyway... it beats the alternative, doesn't it?

Trudging Forward...

I'm alive again...
Yeah, I was really down in the dumps on Tuesday. I dunno. I just didn't want to talk to anybody or do anything but when I started writing, I kept going and the rest is on here. But that was just a moment in time and now with some sleep and getting back into the Word. I've been feeling a bit better over the last few days. Now that's not to say that I haven't gotten a few surprises thrown at me to keep things interesting. Oh let's see, getting the $277 water bill after the pipes burst in March. I wanted to crawl under a rock. I still have a lot to do to my Dad's place... I'm looking forward to unloading it. I won't see a dime probably but I will be happy once it's gone. I've got so much crap going on... but life should be getting better. I'm going with the women's football team on Saturday to Milwaukee to play the Momentum at 8pm ET on the same site that I did the Cherokee hockey broadcasts on... http://cherokee.totalink.net I'm supposed to ride the bus with the team but I'm thinking about driving to South Bend early Saturday morning and catching the Notre Dame spring football game... we'll see what happens...

Tuesday is Bluesday

Arrrgh!
Sorry, but that's the way I feel about today. I'm tired, cranky and irritable. Of course, I can feel that still, inner voice within me saying 'let it go Mik, just let it go...' I'm stressed to beat the band. I had a pretty good day at work but I didn't even think about work at all while I was there. My head is swimming in some self doubt, worry about the family and how things will play out there. I see my nephews growing up and realize that I'm getting older and that I'm not where I wanted to be at this point in my life. I didn't want to be mega rich or with the envious title behind my name. I just think about where I've been and how I arrived at this point and I'm not real happy with myself. I get mad at myself because I realize that I wasn't willing to put myself through what I needed to in order to get where I wanted to be... and yet I am still going through tough times like others do. Only I am not where I'd like to be and it's a tough pill to swallow because I am not happy with me. I always said that no matter what I was doing, as long as I was happy, I could pump gas, empty garbage, or babble into a microphone... it didn't matter. I could have been better than I am. I should have been better than I am. But I got in the game too late and didn't realize the road that I was on all those years ago was the wrong one. I was all set to ride out the rest of my days alone. But even that got screwed up. I dunno what to think anymore. I'm tired and I've exerted a lot of energy. Most of the energy that I've spent has been in the form of this pity party of an entry that I'm writing. I'm going to call it a night and curl up in my bed and just stare at the ceiling in the darkness until I fall asleep.

An excerpt from 'Six Hours One Friday' by Max Lucado

Special Thanks to Stacey who printed this on her blog... I read it and sat stunned. This has always been my favorite part of the Bible. Because it is the part that always stirred up the most emotion in me when I thought I had none left... It is the ultimate in forgiveness and redemption... Peace to all... friend and foe alike...


Good Friday
Skull's hill-windswept and stony. The thief-gaunt and pale.Hinges squeak as the door of death closes on his life.His situation is pitiful. He's taking the last step down the spiral staircase of failure. One crime after another. One rejection after another. Lower and lower he descended until he reached the bottom---a crossbeam and three spikes. He can't hide who he is. His only clothing is the cloak of his disgrace. No fancy jargon. No impressive resume. No Sunday school afterwards. Just a naked history of failure. He sees Jesus.Earlier he had mocked the man. When the crowd first chorused its criticism, he'd sung his part. But now he doesn't mock Jesus. He studies him. He begins to wonder who this man might be. How strange. He doesn't resist the nails; he almost invites them.He hears the jests and the insults and sees the man remain quiet. He sees the fresh blood on Jesus' cheeks, the crown of thorns scraping Jesus' scalp, and he hears the hoarse whisper, "Father, forgive them."Why do they want him dead?Slowly the thief's curiosity offsets the pain in his body. He momentarily forgets the nails rubbing against the raw bones of his wrists and the cramps in his calves.He begins to feel a peculiar warmth in his heart: he begins to care; he begins to care about this peaceful martyr.There's no anger in his eyes, only tears.He looks at the huddle of soldiers throwing dice in the dirt, gambling for a ragged robe. He sees the sign above Jesus' head. It's painted with sarcasm: King of the Jews.They mock him as a king. If he were crazy, they would ignore him. If he had no followers, they'd turn him away. If he were nothing to fear, they wouldn't kill him. You only kill a king if he has a kingdom.Could it be....His cracked lips open to speak.Then, all of a sudden, his thoughts are exploded by the accusations of the criminal on the other cross. He, too, has been studying Jesus, but studying through the blurred lens of cynicism. "So you're the Messiah, are you? Prove it by saving yourself--and us, too, while you're at it!" It's an inexplicable dilemma--how two people can hear the same words and see the same Savior, and one see hope and the other see nothing but himself.It was all the first criminal could take. Perhaps the crook who hurled the barb expected the other crook to take the cue and hurl a few of his own. But he didn't. No second verse was sung. What the bitter-tongued criminal did hear were words of defense."Don't you fear God?"Only minutes before these same lips had cursed Jesus. Now they are defending him. Every head on the hill lifts to look at this one who spoke on behalf of the Christ. Every angel weeps and every demon gapes.Who could have imagined this thief thinking of anyone but himself? He'd always been the bully, the purse-snatching brat. Who could remember the last time he'd come to someone's aid? But as the last grains of sand trickle through his hourglass, he performs man's noblest act. He speaks on God's behalf.Where are those we would expect to defend Jesus?A much more spiritual Peter has abandoned him.A much more educated Pilate has washed his hands of him.A much more loyal mob of countrymen has demanded his death.A much more faithful band of disciples has scattered. When it seems that everyone has turned away, a crook places himself between Jesus and the accusers and speaks on his behalf. "Don't you even fear God when you are dying? We deserve to die for our evil deeds, but this man hasn't done one thing wrong."The soldiers look up. The priests cease chattering. Mary wipes her tears and raises her eyes. No one had even noticed the fellow, but now everyone looks at him.Perhaps even Jesus looks at him. Perhaps he turns to see the one who had spoken when all others had remained silent. Perhaps he fights to focus his eyes on the one who offered this final gesture of love he'd receive while alive. I wonder, did he smile as this sheep straggled into the fold?For that, in effect, is exactly what the criminal is doing. He is stumbling to safety just as the gate is closing. Lodged in the thief's statement are the two facts that anyone needs to recognize in order to come to Jesus. Look at the phrase again. Do you see them?"We are getting what we deserve. This man has done nothing wrong."We are guilty and he is innocent.We are filthy and he is pure.We are wrong and he is right.He is not on that cross for his sins. He is there for ours.And once the crook understands this, his request seems only natural. As he looks into the eyes of his last hope, he made the same request any Christian has made."Remember me when you come into your kingdom."No stained-glass homilies. No excuses. Just a desperate plea for help.At this point Jesus performs the greatest miracle of the cross. Greater than the earthquake. Greater than the tearing of the temple curtain. Greater than the darkness. Greater than the resurrected saints appearing on the streets.He performs the miracle of forgiveness. A sin-soaked criminal is received by a blood-stained Savior. "Today you will be with me in Paradise. This is a solemn promise."Wow. Only seconds before the thief was a beggar nervously squeezing his hat at the castle door, wondering if the King might spare a few crumbs. Suddenly he's holding the whole pantry.Such is the definition of grace.

Easter...Passover...The Passion... etc...

My heart is feeling heavy, nothing anyone can do
Putting one foot in front of the other, I wish that I knew
What answers that the future holds, what'll happen in time?
But I know that I'd rob faith of her ever so sweet sublime

I wish things were different but the truth's already known
I can't change the past, and the future is still unknown
Putting pieces back together and I have to try and live again
Instead of doing it alone, I have to trust You with my life again

I'm giving You my love, I'm giving You my fear
I'm letting go of the past and all I see and hear
It all belongs to You and I will do it while afraid
Living for You, this simple life that You have made

I feel like I'm wandering, and I feel inside like I'm lost
But instead of giving up, I leave my fear at the foot of the Cross
I don't know where I'm going, I only know where I've been
I can place my trust in You, My faith in You, sight unseen

You gave up everything for me, and took a beating for all time
And here I am still living, and yet all that I can do is whine
I hope that whatever the future has instore for me and those I love
Will be for the Honor, Glory and Praise to You in Heaven above

Happy Easter y'all...

Working For A Living...

Ugh... what a day...
I got to work and my boss was being a pain in my backside. I had trouble finding a parking spot and was 3 minutes late. She looked at the clock to kind of silently remind me that I needed to get there on time. I didn't say anything but I did let her know that I stayed almost an hour after my shift on Saturday to help some of the other people get aquainted with the new computer system. My boss didn't know and didn't say much. She asked what time did I leave and I said I didn't know and that it didn't matter. I was working to help out and that I didn't need to sign up for OT or anything. She offered to let me leave early but I told her that wasn't why I did it. There are still issues with the new software. The bugs have yet to be worked out. I worked my full shift and she didn't say anything and that was okay with me. I was a little annoyed about the whole thing but it didn't change my thoughts about my boss... unlike most of my co-workers, I genuinely am very fond of my boss. She's pretty cool. I get along with her most of the time. I can feel a very nasty migrane coming on. I'm trying to fight it but that remains to be seen.
I've had a lot on my mind lately. Most of it has nothing to do with work, play, the ex gal pal, the family... nothing like that at all. It's all in my head and I know that I've got to somehow get my poop in a group. I'm stressed but I know that I can survive it... That might be the reason for the migrane headache... a stress headache. There is no time off now that the hockey season is over. This weekend, is the opening kickoff for the Toledo Spitfire Women's football team. They play their season opener this Saturday night against the Erie (PA) Illusion... We were awful last year and I don't know what to expect this season. Oh well... it should be interesting. I'll be broadcasting it on both TV and audio online... I just hope the team is better than last year. We went 0-8 last season and lost by an average of about 50 points... Let's hope things are a bit better this year.

Going... Going... Zzzzz!

I'm half baked right now...
No, not from partying or anything like that. I had to work on what were supposed to be days off but because of all the vacation time I used going to St. Louis and Philadelphia, I had to make some of it up here this week. Last night, the players and staff got together one last time before everyone parted for the spring/summer. It was great because I got to hear some great news about where some of the guys are going to play hockey next year. Even Toby. Yes, that's right... Toby was scouted by a Division III school in New England who want him to come play next fall. I was so incredibly happy for him. He'll be going to school and those broke down knees will get to play more hockey! Big Andy was so happy because he got a scholarship to go play Division III out near Fargo, North Dakota at Concordia College. Dan got a ride to play hockey at S.U.N.Y.- Morrisville, NY. I was so proud of them. Of course the really hard part is that they will be leaving Toledo and I'll most likely never see them again. That's the hard part of it. You make the most wonderful of friendships with these guys but your goal is to move them up and on... Swede isn't sure if he's going to go to school back home in Sweden, or come back in the fall and go to school here. It's going to depend on how things work out with his girlfriend who lives in Jackson, Michigan. I've met her. She's worth leaving home for...LOL. There are probably going to be around 8-10 guys who may come back to us next September. But that is yet to be seen. I'm already missing these clowns. God Bless each and every one of them.
Well, back to work... We're changing computer systems at work and that is a complete pain in the ya-ya's. I stayed after my shift at work to teach some of this crap to others... and I'm not a computer geek! You know it was bad when the I-T person who was there to help implement everything had a problem with the program and I had to show him how to add a couple of things... and it's HIS program... It was a real stressful day to say the least. I left work and came home and decided that my Saturday night would be spent in front of the TV watching a hockey game and falling asleep. I haven't been to Church in the last two weeks in person and am really looking forward to it tomorrow morning. I've been lazy in getting around to other blogs/journals but all of you please know that I'm thinking about you all... I hope you're all doing good and are healthy and happy. I was supposed to go on a date, but instead, I'm going to go spend quality time with my pillow and fall asleep. I normally don't sleep alot, but these days, I am enjoying slumberland... big time! Zzzzzzzzzzz....

The Vets

Dinner after winning the semis in OT... going counter clockwise from the left: Jesper (aka Swede), Bart with his back to the camera, Tom (trying to hide his face), Korey, Dan, Nate, and Austin...

Downtime...

Some of the boys grabbing some lunch... clockwise from left Nate, J.R., Toby, Devon, and Ryan...

Toby and Roo

This was taken after we shocked Minnesota in the Semi-finals. Toby is on the far left (still beaming after scoring the game winning goal) and Roo was looking away from the camera, checking out some young lady and not concerned about the quality of the family photo... I think this was the first time I seen their dad (in the middle) smile all season :)

Memories From Nationals

This is the team I work for...

This is the thing I live for... (next to God of course)

This is the sports logo that means the most to me...

This is the Toledo Cherokee...

St. Louis Wins the National Title... Again

We lost in what the head of USA Hockey called "one of the best and hardest fought games that we've seen in recent years". St. Louis 5 Toledo 4... I was so proud of those guys. They gave it their all and left it all on the ice. It was heartbreaking to see some of these guys who knew it was their final time in a Toledo Cherokee uniform. Almost every player was in tears. After I was done broadcasting, I walked out onto the ice to be with the players. I hugged a number of them. I went to Jesper who will go home to Sweden in a few days, and hugged him so tight. He looked at me and said "thank you Mik. thank you for everything." I went and hugged big Andy who couldn't even speak. He was crying and couldn't do anything. Nate, one of our veterans who will be going on to play at the next level next year, realized his time with the Cherokee was over, looked over to me in between sobs and said "it was a hell of a ride Mik, thanks"... I was fine until I saw Toby and Roo... Their dad was on the ice and asked me to take a picture with them and the runner-up trophy. Toby said 'sure' and said to his dad "I love this guy"... I just hugged Toby forever and then some. We took the picture with Roo and the trophy and I hugged Toby again and he thanked me for what I did. I couldn't hold back the tears. I told him I loved him and that he meant alot to this team and to me. Toby skated away to the lockerroom, in what was most likely the final game of his career. And then there was Kinsey, our assistant coach. He just coached his last game as he's retiring from coaching. I walked over to him and gave him the biggest bearhug. He had a smile on his face and in his most boyish way, said "hey, what a game, eh?" My heart really hurt inside because Kinsey was my balance. When I saw the other coaches or players getting out of hand, Kinsey could find the right words to bring things back where they needed to be. Kinsey is so laid back, but is without a doubt one of the funniest people on the planet. My heart is heavy, but it is also full of pride. I know those guys gave their all for themselves and each other... It was an honor for me to know these guys and go through the season with them... I will miss them terribly...

We Made It... Toledo vs St. Louis For the National Championship

Thank You God!!!

We've done the unthinkable... we made it to the national championship game on Tuesday night... A heart-stopping, overtime 3-2 win over the Minnesota Ice Hawks on Monday night put us there... It was an end to end thriller with both teams on the edge the whole night... I was screaming like a schoolgirl on the air when Toby scored the goal. It wasn't a highlight reel spectacular goal. Toby just picked up a loose puck and skated wide and fired a 25-footer towards the net and captured the Ice Hawk goaltender completely by surprise. It triggered off a wild celebration on the ice... To give you an idea how special it is to have made it there, I should tell you, it has been all season, never getting respect. We've never been considered a top team this year. We finished the regular season in a tie for third. We had the tie-breaker to occupy the third spot in the playoff seeding. But the league put us in the fourth spot anyway. Our arguably two best players (twin brothers) got called up to the next level halfway through the season. Our parent team was supposed to send us a couple of players to help us since we gave them our 2 best players. Of course they sent not one player to us to help all year and we were left in the cold to fend for ourselves. When we went to the playoffs, most folks said we might get out of the first round but that would be it. So, what happened? We play the first round against a team we hadn't beaten all year and swept them. Next, at Hurster Cup, we beat the #1 team in the nation but lose to them in the league championship game. But by beating them the first time and not losing any games in the round robin portion of the tournament, we qualified for nationals. At nationals, we were told that the teams in our pool weren't too bad Syracuse, Connecticut, and Twin Cities... If we were able to pull off two wins against Syracuse and CT., we would most likely lose to the Twin Cities Northern Lights. So, we beat the Northern Lights 3-2 with a goal scored by Nate who was taken down and sliding on his back and still flipped the puck over the Twin Cities goalie. And then Semi-finals Monday night against Minnesota... Minnesota was picked to win the National title. To even beat St. Louis... And we were not even given much thought. Ran into some of the players the night before the game. They said stuff like "have a great trip home" and "have a safe bus ride back"... We just stayed focused and I never seen a group of young men so devoted to each other. We beat the Ice Hawks Monday night with Toby, the most unlikely of heroes, getting the game winning goal. Back when we lost the twins due to call-ups, Toby had given up playing hockey. He was sitting on his couch and doing nothing when his dad and our coach had a conversation. The Michigan Ice Dogs (a team in our league) had his rights, and the rights of his younger brother Roo... so we were able to obtain their rights. That was nice, but they weren't as aggressive and talented as the twins. Roo was very quick and has some talent. Toby on the other hand, was a broken down, out of shape, slow skater with two really bad knees. If he was a horse, he would've been shot and at the glue factory by now. He and Roo played a couple of games 3 years ago but left the team cause they thought that they could dominate the high school level and play elsewhere. A move that Toby to this day says is the biggest regret of his life. This year is his last year of eligibility and then his career is probably over. But he had heart and he had experience. So he helped us out a little bit. It wasn't till the last couple of weeks of the regular season and throughout the playoffs, Toby and Roo both have stepped up their games. Especially Toby. He was a long shot to do anything special and yet it was Toby who scored the overtime goal to put us into the National Championship. I never seen him able to leap so high in the air. The whole team mobbed him. He climbed out of the pile and went over to one of our coaches and fell into his arms and started sobbing like a little kid. It was so satisfying to see such a good person who is in the twilight of his career, at the ripe old age of 20... Prior to this, he had never been to any kind of playoff or post-season... this is the first time he's been to anything in the post-season... and in his last season as a player. I found myself crying on the broadcast when Toby was on the ice and being mobbed by his teammates. Even people in the stands had tears in their eyes while watching all of this unfold... I felt such pride as a member of the Toledo Cherokee. We have to beat St. Louis again, this time in the National Championship game tonight at 7:30pm ET... I'll be broadcasting it on http://cherokee.totalink.net and in my heart I'll be rooting for the underdogs, including an outta shape, broke down, old horse with two bum knees to get a ring... and for Toby too...

We Made It to the Final Four...

We are in the semi-finals...

I am stunned. We battled and hung on to beat the Twin Cities 4-3. We almost gave it away (it was tied at 3-3) but scored with only three minutes to go in the game. The team went bezerk. The fans that came went absolutely nuts. I celebrated the only way an old guy like me knows how to... I went back to the hotel and fell asleep... But now comes the EVEN HARDER part. We have to battle the Minnesota Ice Hawks in the semi-finals. I got to watch these guys and boy are they good. But the same was said of Twin Cities... and that is true also. In fact, Twin Cities qualified for the final four as a wild card even though we beat them. I'm more nervous than I have ever been. BUT, only two wins away from a ring... wow, I can only leave it in God's hands...

Two In A Row

Oh my,
The poopin' pickle pace has just picked up... we beat Connecticut last night 3-2. It was sloppy but at least we won. Now today comes the big showdown. We have to tangle with Twin Cities today. Twin Cities cranked Connecticut to the tune of 12-1 on Friday and beat Syracuse 3-0 yesterday. This is the game that will determine whether or not the Cherokee will advance to the final four tomorrow night. I am soooo nervous. I can't stand it. But that's what is so great about playing for a national championship... As far as off the ice, it actually has been pretty neat. Some of the media back home, which previously ignored our team throughout the regular season, are now paying attention to our playoff run. I was happy to see that.