The Art of Breaking (the alarm) and Entering...

From the files of "Police Squad" (not)... Lt. Frank Drebin would be proud...

So, I go to see my gal pal cause I needed to and the fact that she never fails to amaze me, not only with her beauty, but with her gentleness, kindness, and (when dealing with me) PATIENCE! (ha-ha). I just flat out love that girl. And she loves me too! Always a huge bonus. Well, we go to church on Sunday morning because that is what we do. We also, like always, go down the street to get something to eat afterwards. So we go and eat and her parents are there in the back private room, eating with a large group of folks from Georgia who came up to teach Vacation Bible School for the week. So her parents were going to give them the two dollar tour of where they'd be teaching at. It was a hot, very hot, day and I was dripping with sweat already. So her dad tosses me the key to his house and says "here ya go". The wonderful thought of kicking back in the air conditioned comfort with my best girl made me smile. So the gal pal and I pull up and I help her into her wheelchair. I go to unlock the door, and hear the alarm go off. I stay calm and ask the gal pal if she knows the code to shut it off. She gives me the numbers and they turn out to be wrong. I hear the phone ring in the backround but don't know where it is. So I call her father on his cell and explain to him the noise he hears in the backround is me apparently breaking and entering because there is an alarm going off here!!! He calmly gives me the code to enter and sure enough, the alarm shuts off. Then he asks me "did the phone ring yet?" My heart begins to sink as I reply "uh, yes." He comes back with "oh, that was the security company, they're going to send the law out after you. It was nice knowing you Mik." Everyone loves a smartalec... So I figure I'll explain everything when they get there and hope they have a sense of humor. I get the gal pal out of her wheelchair and onto the sofa so she can get comfortable. I go to the bathroom and change out of my church clothes because they are soaked with sweat (gee I wonder why?) and I change into a t-shirt and shorts. Then the phone rings again. My heart starts to pound as I race towards it from the bathroom. I see the phone in the kitchen, setting in it's recharging station. I pick it up and hit the 'talk' button to answer it. It's only a split second later that I realized that once you lift the phone from the charger when it's ringing, that it will automatically answer. So when I hit the 'talk' button, I actually disconnected the call. I look on the caller ID and sure enough, I had just hung up on the boys in blue!!! I let out a curse word (sh**) and in the other room, the gal pal yells out "what did you just say?" and starts laughing at me. I called the number back on the phone and they answer and I just flowed like a volcano when lava spews out, explaining the situation and even the police person on the other end of the phone laughed at me. So FINALLY we got everything resolved and I was able to sit on the couch with the gal pal and I think I put her to sleep (also known as putting one of my all-time favorite movies on: "Rudy"... the movie about the Notre Dame football player). A little while later, her dad comes home and walks in and looks at me and as he's walking by, he chirps at me "Mik, are you still here?" and starts laughing at me. I told him if he ever thought I might consider a life of crime, this experience should put any such thought to rest. My gal pal had the biggest grin on her face. Probably because it involved something other than watch a movie that was putting her to sleep. Her inept, would be burglar just laid his head on her lap and knew it was all going to be fine when she just ran her fingers through his hair. Man, I really do love that girl!