Well,
Just like the title infers, the ups and downs of life goes on... My sister Lou has been wacking out again. I am convinced more than ever that she is affected by the medications that her doctors have put her on. She is not at all herself and is displaying weird behaviors and is a mess right now. A few days ago she seemed to be really making a bit of progress. But today I got a phone call from the visiting nurse who said that she was completely disoriented and acting very irrational. I headed over there only to find out that she was already enroute to the doctors. She was in great pain and the doctors have been dragging their feet in finding out what's going on. Her pain management doc said he won't touch her until she goes and sees an infectious disease doc first. So she made the appointment and was supposed to go see the I.D. doc today. Well the pain mgt. goofball says that he's on vacation next week so he can't see her until the 20th. What the heck is this noise? So I got a phone call saying she's going to see the infectious disease doc in the hope that he'll refer her to the hospital and a pain mgt consult so that someone other than the meathead she has will treat her and actually DO SOMETHING! But the I.D. doc wants to wait and try something in a few days but Lou has been in pain from her back for over a month. So she went from there to the hospital ER. I spent the afternoon talking with Terri. Terri is about ready to go crazy. Lou (in the state that she's in) is confused and disoriented and has been running Terri ragged. Terri was telling me this stuff through tears. It's eating her alive because she wants to have compassion on Lou and help her. But Lou's erratic behavior at all hours of the day and night have driven Terri to the breaking point. Not to mention Terri is on chemotherapy herself and is SUPPOSED to be resting and not doing much at all. Ha! My prayer is that they admit Lou to the hospital and try to find out what is going on with her. She's not safe to be home alone and is a danger to herself... To be honest, I want Terri to have a break from the pressure and all of this stuff that has her at her wit's end. Other than that, I'm plugging along. The Cherokee tryout camp is this weekend. I'm not going to be there for most of it as I have several other commitments including working at my day job.But I'm looking forward to hitting the road again this fall. But say a prayer for Lou and Terri. They're both really good people who are in a season of trial and storm. But my prayer is that the season be a really short one and ends soon. Like maybe, yesterday! God, please have mercy on them...
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Monday, July 30, 2007
The Gal Pal...
Some pics of me and the Gal Pal from my birthday. We had such a wonderful time together. I have never been happier than being in her arms. It's definitely a case of 'Beauty and the Beast'... She's way out of my league, but loves me anyway. I'm her big dork. She is my heart. Need I say more? I am blessed... :) By the way, the charmin was just lying around so I decided to make good use of it... lol...
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Dreaming Of Blue Grass...
Random thoughts as I look forward to a weekend of … of… of… NOTHING!
I can’t believe what I’m writing! I actually have most of the weekend off that doesn’t require me to be at some ridiculous place at an ungodly hour to broadcast some insane event… I get to spend time doing things I should be doing… uh, let’s see: the lawn, sweeping, vacuuming, the dishes… y’know: CHORES!!! My house isn’t too bad, mess wise. But man, I’ve got to get some of the dust bunnies cleared out of here. One of the drawbacks of living on a lake… bugs! Some spiders, a few flies, (Mayflies have been lingering around even though they’re supposed to be done for the season) and they are generally harmless and aren’t that irritating. BUT for some reason, I remember how disgusting they were in my childhood, so even though it is many years later, I still have an insatiable urge to wipe out ever last one of the little varmints… I mean as a kid, I felt like the little CARE kids in the TV commercials that were always looking into the camera and there would inevitably be a couple of flies who were hellbent on getting their smug little wispy wings on television and would be crawling across the poor little faces that were on there. My heart always went to those people (it still does), but I hated those dang flies because those kids in those CARE commercials would NEVER swat or shoo the flies away. The little flies would just crawl where ever they felt like and the kid wouldn’t do anything… and that bugged (pun intended) the living crap out of me. That was like fingernails on a chalkboard to me. Oh how I hated those commercials. The purpose for them was good and just (I hate that those little ones have to suffer), but the stigmas from my childhood of seeing those kids just stand there and let those dang flies just crawl on them. Ewww… I’m still scarred for life!
Okay, now that I’ve gotten some old neurosis on the table, I can feel free to give an update on the sisters: in a word… better. Lou is still in great discomfort but is able to tolerate it better and is awaiting the results of her biopsy. She sleeps a lot more than she has and that’s good. But it’s been a rough road for Terri. She is feeling better from a pain standpoint. But she is wiped out because when I’m at work and can’t be there and no one else can be there because of work, she and Lou have to fend for themselves and she’s supposed to be resting. Lou gets around okay considering the amputation, but Terri has to do a lot for both of them and it bothers me a little bit sometimes… okay, a lot! But they both were feeling pretty good even though they were drained… they were giving me crap about the gal pal cracking the whip on me to keep me in line and were talking in fake accents pretending to be me and my beloved and they were picking on their little brother mercilessly and making his girlfriend out to be one smart and tough lady… Okay, that part is very true. SHE IS… but they love it when it’s about the gal pal keeping me in line. We’ve got a good sense of humor about it. I love that girl… She never fails to amaze and inspire me. I am a very blessed man.
I can’t believe what I’m writing! I actually have most of the weekend off that doesn’t require me to be at some ridiculous place at an ungodly hour to broadcast some insane event… I get to spend time doing things I should be doing… uh, let’s see: the lawn, sweeping, vacuuming, the dishes… y’know: CHORES!!! My house isn’t too bad, mess wise. But man, I’ve got to get some of the dust bunnies cleared out of here. One of the drawbacks of living on a lake… bugs! Some spiders, a few flies, (Mayflies have been lingering around even though they’re supposed to be done for the season) and they are generally harmless and aren’t that irritating. BUT for some reason, I remember how disgusting they were in my childhood, so even though it is many years later, I still have an insatiable urge to wipe out ever last one of the little varmints… I mean as a kid, I felt like the little CARE kids in the TV commercials that were always looking into the camera and there would inevitably be a couple of flies who were hellbent on getting their smug little wispy wings on television and would be crawling across the poor little faces that were on there. My heart always went to those people (it still does), but I hated those dang flies because those kids in those CARE commercials would NEVER swat or shoo the flies away. The little flies would just crawl where ever they felt like and the kid wouldn’t do anything… and that bugged (pun intended) the living crap out of me. That was like fingernails on a chalkboard to me. Oh how I hated those commercials. The purpose for them was good and just (I hate that those little ones have to suffer), but the stigmas from my childhood of seeing those kids just stand there and let those dang flies just crawl on them. Ewww… I’m still scarred for life!
Okay, now that I’ve gotten some old neurosis on the table, I can feel free to give an update on the sisters: in a word… better. Lou is still in great discomfort but is able to tolerate it better and is awaiting the results of her biopsy. She sleeps a lot more than she has and that’s good. But it’s been a rough road for Terri. She is feeling better from a pain standpoint. But she is wiped out because when I’m at work and can’t be there and no one else can be there because of work, she and Lou have to fend for themselves and she’s supposed to be resting. Lou gets around okay considering the amputation, but Terri has to do a lot for both of them and it bothers me a little bit sometimes… okay, a lot! But they both were feeling pretty good even though they were drained… they were giving me crap about the gal pal cracking the whip on me to keep me in line and were talking in fake accents pretending to be me and my beloved and they were picking on their little brother mercilessly and making his girlfriend out to be one smart and tough lady… Okay, that part is very true. SHE IS… but they love it when it’s about the gal pal keeping me in line. We’ve got a good sense of humor about it. I love that girl… She never fails to amaze and inspire me. I am a very blessed man.
Saturday, July 21, 2007
I Could Have it Worse...
Sometimes when I feel a little frustrated about things in life (the sisters), I need to get a little perspective and remember that I don't have it so bad. This video is from Easter at my church where Mike Leeland does a great painting during this song. It kicks my butt and makes me realize that I don't have it so bad. That someone suffered worse... much worse... even for those of you that aren't christian, hey, it's a pretty cool canvas painting to check out... hope y'all are doing okay...
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Thursday Thoughts...
Howdy do...
Just checking in to say hello and let you know what's been going on over the last few days. Not a whole lot really. Terri is still on her butt from the chemo. She is whipped to say the least, sheer misery right now... Lou is just out of it... she's just laying in bed sleeping off an on. They're trying some different combinations with her meds and the docs are going to run some more tests to see whats going on with her back. She's having a biopsy next tuesday to see what she's dealing with... meanwhile her back is absolutely killing her still. But I guess if there's one positive (sort of) is that while the pain is bad, it's not as bad as it was...so... Thank you all for your prayers. It means more than you know. Spent my day off from work on Thursday over at the girls and they were both just awful. I felt like a big dufus cause all I can do is just sit there and watch them suffer. I did a couple of little things like make dinner and what not, but I am still at a loss as to what I can do to help them... It's a little frustrating but I know that all I can do is just be there. I am hoping that things get better soon, but I know that it's all in God's hands... Meanwhile, not much else is going on between work and other stuff... we did our online golf radio show last night (great lakes golf today) and had a good laugh about lots of things... a nice escape from the reality of seeing both sisters suffer so miserably.
Just checking in to say hello and let you know what's been going on over the last few days. Not a whole lot really. Terri is still on her butt from the chemo. She is whipped to say the least, sheer misery right now... Lou is just out of it... she's just laying in bed sleeping off an on. They're trying some different combinations with her meds and the docs are going to run some more tests to see whats going on with her back. She's having a biopsy next tuesday to see what she's dealing with... meanwhile her back is absolutely killing her still. But I guess if there's one positive (sort of) is that while the pain is bad, it's not as bad as it was...so... Thank you all for your prayers. It means more than you know. Spent my day off from work on Thursday over at the girls and they were both just awful. I felt like a big dufus cause all I can do is just sit there and watch them suffer. I did a couple of little things like make dinner and what not, but I am still at a loss as to what I can do to help them... It's a little frustrating but I know that all I can do is just be there. I am hoping that things get better soon, but I know that it's all in God's hands... Meanwhile, not much else is going on between work and other stuff... we did our online golf radio show last night (great lakes golf today) and had a good laugh about lots of things... a nice escape from the reality of seeing both sisters suffer so miserably.
Monday, July 16, 2007
Gratitude...
What a time...
Right now I'm swooning thinking about tons of things that are going through my brain at the moment. First off, a huge thanks to all of you for the birthday wishes. It meant a great deal to me. I had a GREAT weekend. And the term 'great' doesn't even begin to cover the weekend I had. But first things first. The sisters update: not much more new to say other than Terri is going to get her next chemo treatment tomorrow. I know that is going to kick her butt... I'm not looking forward to that, but it's a necessary evil if we're going to keep her going. Lou is still a bit of an enigma. She still has some kidney issues and hopefully those will get rectified. But she's been 'out of sorts' as of late and I'm really beginning to get concerned. I hope that her docs make some decisions. Okay, now to the weekend. Two words: GAL PAL... My gal pal has been nothing short of A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!! I saw her on Friday and just smiled as I threw my arms around her. Her parents took me to a ball game (which is what I wanted to go see) and treated me like a million bucks. On Saturday, I spent the day with my gal pal and to say that she is awesome does not do her justice. I can't even begin to find the words to say what this woman has brought to me emotionally. I've gotten more out of holding her hand and seeing her smile than I've gotten out of any other intimate relationship I've ever had. That's not an attempt to insult those other people, but it is just a tribute to the beauty, warmth and tenderness that is my gal pal. She is an awesome, beautiful, Christian who has good, grounded beliefs and to say that she is an inspiration to me doesn't even begin to scratch the surface.
Saturday night brought a cookout. Not just a cookout like I'm used to where maybe six or seven people would show up and grill a hot dog or two and have some chips and everyone would pound beers till they passed out... I was blessed and I do mean BLESSED by my gal pal's family. I mean her whole family came as in uncles, aunts (hi Sundae), grandparents, cousins, friends, etc., and they all brought just obscene amounts of food. And the big ol' fish fry was wonderful. And I think I had two servings of fish. Interesting, considering that I don't even like fish. It was THAT good. I couldn't believe what these people (most of whom didn't even really know me. They only knew of me) went and did for me. Even her cousin and and a friend of hers broke out the guitars on a warm and breezy evening and started playing some music. Most of the people there go to the same church so I knew I'd see them the next day. The birthday cake they had made for me was HUGE... and very delicious. I think I had three pieces. I was dumbfounded. They all just shrugged it off as nothing more than hospitality, but I couldn't even fathom such wonderful kindness to what amounted to a stranger. They get together and fellowship and picnic outside like this on a somewhat regular basis. But they all came up to me and sang happy birthday to me twice and were so happy to see me with the gal pal. They took a picture or two of us and when I get them from her, I'll pop them up here.
Sunday brought a quiet day for me. It was the actual b-day for yours truly. I just went to church with the gal pal and her family and we went to lunch afterwards. We had a really wonderful weekend and I wanted to spend some quiet time with my best gal. We spent Sunday afternoon with a movie and some time talking and really enjoying each other's company. Looking in her eyes, I found myself falling in love with her over and over again. Spent more time with her family and friends and found myself in a very odd position of getting ready to head home and embark on the long drive, but my heart wanted to stay there. I wanted to just sit and watch the sun set with mi amour. The sun went down while we were sitting at her computer (i'm such a romantic...ha!) and I left and made the long trek home and knew my heart was smiling a mile wide inside.Well, today finds me back to reality as another work week begins. Also, today is the second year anniversary of my dad's passing. I still miss him. We didn't always have the closest of relationships but we pulled it together in the last five years of his life here on earth. He really showed what it was to love someone and I learned that from him. He loved his family and he loved God and even though it took us a while to patch things up... yep, he even loved me... I miss you dad. I know you're happy in Heaven with the truest love of your life. Give mom a hug and kiss for me and enjoy your eternal rewards... oh, and if you think about it, tell God I said thanks for giving me you as my dad... I'm sure He knows, but tell Him anyway, okay? And tell Him how grateful I am for our family and my gal pal and her family too! I love them all... I really do...
Right now I'm swooning thinking about tons of things that are going through my brain at the moment. First off, a huge thanks to all of you for the birthday wishes. It meant a great deal to me. I had a GREAT weekend. And the term 'great' doesn't even begin to cover the weekend I had. But first things first. The sisters update: not much more new to say other than Terri is going to get her next chemo treatment tomorrow. I know that is going to kick her butt... I'm not looking forward to that, but it's a necessary evil if we're going to keep her going. Lou is still a bit of an enigma. She still has some kidney issues and hopefully those will get rectified. But she's been 'out of sorts' as of late and I'm really beginning to get concerned. I hope that her docs make some decisions. Okay, now to the weekend. Two words: GAL PAL... My gal pal has been nothing short of A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!! I saw her on Friday and just smiled as I threw my arms around her. Her parents took me to a ball game (which is what I wanted to go see) and treated me like a million bucks. On Saturday, I spent the day with my gal pal and to say that she is awesome does not do her justice. I can't even begin to find the words to say what this woman has brought to me emotionally. I've gotten more out of holding her hand and seeing her smile than I've gotten out of any other intimate relationship I've ever had. That's not an attempt to insult those other people, but it is just a tribute to the beauty, warmth and tenderness that is my gal pal. She is an awesome, beautiful, Christian who has good, grounded beliefs and to say that she is an inspiration to me doesn't even begin to scratch the surface.
Saturday night brought a cookout. Not just a cookout like I'm used to where maybe six or seven people would show up and grill a hot dog or two and have some chips and everyone would pound beers till they passed out... I was blessed and I do mean BLESSED by my gal pal's family. I mean her whole family came as in uncles, aunts (hi Sundae), grandparents, cousins, friends, etc., and they all brought just obscene amounts of food. And the big ol' fish fry was wonderful. And I think I had two servings of fish. Interesting, considering that I don't even like fish. It was THAT good. I couldn't believe what these people (most of whom didn't even really know me. They only knew of me) went and did for me. Even her cousin and and a friend of hers broke out the guitars on a warm and breezy evening and started playing some music. Most of the people there go to the same church so I knew I'd see them the next day. The birthday cake they had made for me was HUGE... and very delicious. I think I had three pieces. I was dumbfounded. They all just shrugged it off as nothing more than hospitality, but I couldn't even fathom such wonderful kindness to what amounted to a stranger. They get together and fellowship and picnic outside like this on a somewhat regular basis. But they all came up to me and sang happy birthday to me twice and were so happy to see me with the gal pal. They took a picture or two of us and when I get them from her, I'll pop them up here.
Sunday brought a quiet day for me. It was the actual b-day for yours truly. I just went to church with the gal pal and her family and we went to lunch afterwards. We had a really wonderful weekend and I wanted to spend some quiet time with my best gal. We spent Sunday afternoon with a movie and some time talking and really enjoying each other's company. Looking in her eyes, I found myself falling in love with her over and over again. Spent more time with her family and friends and found myself in a very odd position of getting ready to head home and embark on the long drive, but my heart wanted to stay there. I wanted to just sit and watch the sun set with mi amour. The sun went down while we were sitting at her computer (i'm such a romantic...ha!) and I left and made the long trek home and knew my heart was smiling a mile wide inside.Well, today finds me back to reality as another work week begins. Also, today is the second year anniversary of my dad's passing. I still miss him. We didn't always have the closest of relationships but we pulled it together in the last five years of his life here on earth. He really showed what it was to love someone and I learned that from him. He loved his family and he loved God and even though it took us a while to patch things up... yep, he even loved me... I miss you dad. I know you're happy in Heaven with the truest love of your life. Give mom a hug and kiss for me and enjoy your eternal rewards... oh, and if you think about it, tell God I said thanks for giving me you as my dad... I'm sure He knows, but tell Him anyway, okay? And tell Him how grateful I am for our family and my gal pal and her family too! I love them all... I really do...
Friday, July 13, 2007
Friday On My Mind
It's been a wacky week. But fairly decent. As for the sister update. Lou had an MRI done and she's doing better but still has some serious discomfort in her back and they may find out why and do something about it. Terri is doing a little better for having to deal with the skin issues she has had in regards to the chemo. She gets another dose of it on Tuesday. It'll knock her on her can for a while and she's trying hard to prepare for it. I hope that she somehow keeps up the brave fight she's waging. She is one tough lady and deserves to be happy and healthy. She loves God and her family and her students. I hope and hope and hope. We'll see what happens. Thank you all for your prayers for both of them... I really appreciate it.
Well, the last couple of days, I've done nothing but eat, eat, and eat... I got an early surprise in that the people I work with sprung a little party on me as an early birthday present. I ate (okay graze might be a more appropriate word) like they were going to stop making food and felt good with a full tank of grub. My nephew Dyl, who some of you that have read this column for a while... well, you know about his exploits, well he just had a birthday so I always encourage my family to celebrate his birthday instead of mine because he's just a kid and I am an oldie but a goodie... I turn 43 on Sunday. Inside of my heart, I still feel like a 12 year-old, but outside, I feel like I'm 103 sometimes... but overall, I'm hanging in there. I'm getting to spend it with the gal pal so I'm good. Dyl is having a party with his family tonight but I won't be there. So I invited Dyl and his brother and parents over to my place last night, so they could go swimming at the lake and eat some pizza and have ice cream and we watched a movie as well. There has always been an unspoken understanding that I always had to drive to family members' homes to visit and no one would ever came up to my place to see me. Thursday night, my kid sister and her family came to my place and they loved it and actually said they want to come back. The boys wanted to spend the night but I am heading to see my gal pal and since I haven't gotten to spend as much time as I want with her, I'm taking this opportunity to enjoy some quality time with my best girl... I think we're going to a baseball game tonight. Saturday is a cookout at her family's... and I don't even know what she's got planned for me on Sunday, but I'm looking forward to spending my b-day with the woman that I really love... she is beyond amazing and has really made me a much better person... I thank God for her every single day... She has been such a blessing from God... He really is awesome!!!
Well, the last couple of days, I've done nothing but eat, eat, and eat... I got an early surprise in that the people I work with sprung a little party on me as an early birthday present. I ate (okay graze might be a more appropriate word) like they were going to stop making food and felt good with a full tank of grub. My nephew Dyl, who some of you that have read this column for a while... well, you know about his exploits, well he just had a birthday so I always encourage my family to celebrate his birthday instead of mine because he's just a kid and I am an oldie but a goodie... I turn 43 on Sunday. Inside of my heart, I still feel like a 12 year-old, but outside, I feel like I'm 103 sometimes... but overall, I'm hanging in there. I'm getting to spend it with the gal pal so I'm good. Dyl is having a party with his family tonight but I won't be there. So I invited Dyl and his brother and parents over to my place last night, so they could go swimming at the lake and eat some pizza and have ice cream and we watched a movie as well. There has always been an unspoken understanding that I always had to drive to family members' homes to visit and no one would ever came up to my place to see me. Thursday night, my kid sister and her family came to my place and they loved it and actually said they want to come back. The boys wanted to spend the night but I am heading to see my gal pal and since I haven't gotten to spend as much time as I want with her, I'm taking this opportunity to enjoy some quality time with my best girl... I think we're going to a baseball game tonight. Saturday is a cookout at her family's... and I don't even know what she's got planned for me on Sunday, but I'm looking forward to spending my b-day with the woman that I really love... she is beyond amazing and has really made me a much better person... I thank God for her every single day... She has been such a blessing from God... He really is awesome!!!
Monday, July 09, 2007
Monday Moanin'...
Ahhhh it's Monday again. Geez, I'm so excited (yawn),
I survived the weekend with some sleep. Not much, mind you, but some. Lou is feeling better. Her labs were way off and it caused her to be flat out miserable. But she's better. I am grateful. She still has got kidney problems but hopefully a trip or two to the nephrologist will help. Terri is feeling the skin effects of her chemo. She wants to scratch constantly. She is trying to not scratch but... other than that, not much is different with the sisters right now but please keep the prayers going... After work on Saturday, I went and did the security thing for a high school graduation party. That went off without any problems. The kids were smart and later on met somewhere else to go do stupid stuff... Me, I went to church on Saturday night then went to Todd and Nicole's and watched baseball late Saturday and got up on Sunday feeling pretty relaxed. I took my time because the mass was at 10am and the baptism for Grace wasn't going to be until afterwards. So I pop out of the shower and leave a little early and stop to gas up before heading up to Monroe to the church. I get there about 9:50 in the morning and my cell rings. It's Nicole and she's in a mild panic as the priest informs her at that time that they're going to do the baptism DURING the mass. Oops... fortunately, Nicole's family (who are all Catholic) was there to go to mass anyway. So that kept everything pretty calm. I arrive at the church, ready to be the godfather, not having yet even meeting the godmother. This girl comes over and sits down next to me. She is a very cute kid (as in all the young guys at church were staring at her because they thought she was as one guy said 'smoking hot'). And never said a word to me. I never felt so OLD... I wanted to yell at some of the guys sitting behind her like I was her father or something. As we went up to the baptismal thingy to do our part, I'm like six foot two, standing next to this 18 year old girl who is in a very tight, revealing dress. who is only 5'2" at the most. I am standing there making sure that I do not look at her because of our height differential, it would appear like I would be looking straight down at her cleavage. Unlike most guys my age, I don't have a thing for young teenage girls. I'm very happy with the girlfriend I have and am not interested in anyone else, thank you very much... after we get done with the baptism of Grace, we head back to our pews and I step on the edge of a step and proceed to roll my ankle a bit and have to jump in the air so I could balance myself and not fall down. I was just grateful that there were no cameras flashing.
We go to lunch afterwards and I'm having a good time. I knew that I had to leave and head over to Sonja's memorial trust fundraiser. I arrive there and the place is packed. I know that Sonja would've been proud to see that. Lots of family and friends and co-workers. I see some of the co-workers whom I'm friends with and am looking to enjoy myself, when I hear a 'Hi Mik' that I hadn't heard in about 7 years. It was my old flame K who I haven't seen in a few years. Last I heard she was out in Vermont with a guy and now she comes up to hug me in downtown Toledo. I smile and am polite, but didn't say or feel anything towards her. I've lost some weight since we last saw each other and she kept saying 'Oh my god' over and over. I think I asked if she was back in town and she said yes but then I seen an old friend from high school who was there as well, so I started a converstation with him and K stood there for a minute and opted to leave. I couldn't have cared less. When I looked at her, I tried to remember what it was that I found attractive about her... I couldn't. I felt nothing. I then began to think about my current girlfriend and my heart came back to life. I realized just how far I have come in the last 7-10 years... I couldn't be happier or more grateful for where I am right now. I am completely in love and very happy. And I am at a point in my life where I want peace in my heart and in my life. I never had that before with any other female. I have that now. My heart is relaxed and I have a grateful heart for being blessed with an amazing woman who inspires me every single day. To embrace life and live it. She is my rock... God has my soul and she has my heart. That is how I am able to keep it together...
I survived the weekend with some sleep. Not much, mind you, but some. Lou is feeling better. Her labs were way off and it caused her to be flat out miserable. But she's better. I am grateful. She still has got kidney problems but hopefully a trip or two to the nephrologist will help. Terri is feeling the skin effects of her chemo. She wants to scratch constantly. She is trying to not scratch but... other than that, not much is different with the sisters right now but please keep the prayers going... After work on Saturday, I went and did the security thing for a high school graduation party. That went off without any problems. The kids were smart and later on met somewhere else to go do stupid stuff... Me, I went to church on Saturday night then went to Todd and Nicole's and watched baseball late Saturday and got up on Sunday feeling pretty relaxed. I took my time because the mass was at 10am and the baptism for Grace wasn't going to be until afterwards. So I pop out of the shower and leave a little early and stop to gas up before heading up to Monroe to the church. I get there about 9:50 in the morning and my cell rings. It's Nicole and she's in a mild panic as the priest informs her at that time that they're going to do the baptism DURING the mass. Oops... fortunately, Nicole's family (who are all Catholic) was there to go to mass anyway. So that kept everything pretty calm. I arrive at the church, ready to be the godfather, not having yet even meeting the godmother. This girl comes over and sits down next to me. She is a very cute kid (as in all the young guys at church were staring at her because they thought she was as one guy said 'smoking hot'). And never said a word to me. I never felt so OLD... I wanted to yell at some of the guys sitting behind her like I was her father or something. As we went up to the baptismal thingy to do our part, I'm like six foot two, standing next to this 18 year old girl who is in a very tight, revealing dress. who is only 5'2" at the most. I am standing there making sure that I do not look at her because of our height differential, it would appear like I would be looking straight down at her cleavage. Unlike most guys my age, I don't have a thing for young teenage girls. I'm very happy with the girlfriend I have and am not interested in anyone else, thank you very much... after we get done with the baptism of Grace, we head back to our pews and I step on the edge of a step and proceed to roll my ankle a bit and have to jump in the air so I could balance myself and not fall down. I was just grateful that there were no cameras flashing.
We go to lunch afterwards and I'm having a good time. I knew that I had to leave and head over to Sonja's memorial trust fundraiser. I arrive there and the place is packed. I know that Sonja would've been proud to see that. Lots of family and friends and co-workers. I see some of the co-workers whom I'm friends with and am looking to enjoy myself, when I hear a 'Hi Mik' that I hadn't heard in about 7 years. It was my old flame K who I haven't seen in a few years. Last I heard she was out in Vermont with a guy and now she comes up to hug me in downtown Toledo. I smile and am polite, but didn't say or feel anything towards her. I've lost some weight since we last saw each other and she kept saying 'Oh my god' over and over. I think I asked if she was back in town and she said yes but then I seen an old friend from high school who was there as well, so I started a converstation with him and K stood there for a minute and opted to leave. I couldn't have cared less. When I looked at her, I tried to remember what it was that I found attractive about her... I couldn't. I felt nothing. I then began to think about my current girlfriend and my heart came back to life. I realized just how far I have come in the last 7-10 years... I couldn't be happier or more grateful for where I am right now. I am completely in love and very happy. And I am at a point in my life where I want peace in my heart and in my life. I never had that before with any other female. I have that now. My heart is relaxed and I have a grateful heart for being blessed with an amazing woman who inspires me every single day. To embrace life and live it. She is my rock... God has my soul and she has my heart. That is how I am able to keep it together...
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Post Holiday Thoughts...
And so it goes...
I have had a pretty good week. Thank the Good Lord. A little sleep deprived but that's okay. My sisters are fairing a bit better. Lou is still battling the emotional stress from the meds she is taking, but it's a little better than it was. She's sleeping more and that is a good thing. Terri is doing better but preparing for her next chemo treatment... I just hope and pray that it does it's job... My personal highlight... installing the commode riser for Lou in her toilet... I tried not to think about the obvious rear-end jokes that would fly with this... No ifs, ands, or but(t)s about it... (groan)
Getting ready for the weekend. Did some shopping for the new goddaughter to be... I'm going to be spending more time with my best friend Todd this weekend and his wife Nicole than I have in the last six months... lol... but that's a good thing. I asked Todd why he wanted me to be the godfather of his kids... his response: "because, I can't hold a baby that little while they toss water on her head" Uh, Todd, your first daughter was over 10 lbs at birth and Grace was almost nine. I think we know where they get their genetics from... hello? Nicole just throws up her arms and has given up on trying to figure Todd out... Of course he and I are best friends so what does that tell you about me? HA!
Hope everyone Stateside had a great holiday. Now that it's the day after, I am trying to let all of the food I ate yesterday settle... I chowed down big-time. My stomach still hurts so good. Played horseshoes and cornhole (the game with the bean bags), and tried the Pepsi summer mix (tropical fruit flavor)... as a coca-cola guy, I was surprised how good that new Pepsi tasted. But now I have to let my tummy settle down today and get ready for more eating and eating and (big drumroll) MORE EATING this weekend... ahhhhhhhhhhhhh (burp!)
God's Blessings to all of you!
Mik
I have had a pretty good week. Thank the Good Lord. A little sleep deprived but that's okay. My sisters are fairing a bit better. Lou is still battling the emotional stress from the meds she is taking, but it's a little better than it was. She's sleeping more and that is a good thing. Terri is doing better but preparing for her next chemo treatment... I just hope and pray that it does it's job... My personal highlight... installing the commode riser for Lou in her toilet... I tried not to think about the obvious rear-end jokes that would fly with this... No ifs, ands, or but(t)s about it... (groan)
Getting ready for the weekend. Did some shopping for the new goddaughter to be... I'm going to be spending more time with my best friend Todd this weekend and his wife Nicole than I have in the last six months... lol... but that's a good thing. I asked Todd why he wanted me to be the godfather of his kids... his response: "because, I can't hold a baby that little while they toss water on her head" Uh, Todd, your first daughter was over 10 lbs at birth and Grace was almost nine. I think we know where they get their genetics from... hello? Nicole just throws up her arms and has given up on trying to figure Todd out... Of course he and I are best friends so what does that tell you about me? HA!
Hope everyone Stateside had a great holiday. Now that it's the day after, I am trying to let all of the food I ate yesterday settle... I chowed down big-time. My stomach still hurts so good. Played horseshoes and cornhole (the game with the bean bags), and tried the Pepsi summer mix (tropical fruit flavor)... as a coca-cola guy, I was surprised how good that new Pepsi tasted. But now I have to let my tummy settle down today and get ready for more eating and eating and (big drumroll) MORE EATING this weekend... ahhhhhhhhhhhhh (burp!)
God's Blessings to all of you!
Mik
Monday, July 02, 2007
Monday Musings... July Edition
I'm here... for the most part,
The weekend wasn't too bad. Let's see... the city-wide garage sale was pretty cool. I found a 'Hooked On Phonics' set (only a couple of the parts were actually used- the rest were still sealed new) for only 20 bucks. Normally it costs over 300 smackers... got it for Terri for her classes. Speaking of which. Terri is feeling a lot better from the chemo and is getting around again. The only problem now is Lou. Lou is doing better physically. But the meds she is taking for everything is affecting her emotionally. She is now easily rattled and does not sleep. She had an MRI on her back but the doc is on vacay till next week. So it won't be read until then when they can change the medications to a more appropriate combinations and dosage. Thanks for keeping them in your prayers. I am grateful for your kindness.
From the 'good stuff' dept: My best friend Todd and his wife Nicole are the proud parents a beautiful baby girl... Grace. I was honored to be asked to be her godfather. (i'm the godfather of their other daughter too) So this coming weekend is going to be another busy one. I'm going to work at the hospital on saturday, go and work security for a graduation party. Go to church. On sunday, doing the godfather thing, and probably going out to eat afterwards, and then head over to the memorial trust fundraiser for the children of my friend Sonja who was killed in a car wreck back in May. Somewhere in the middle of that, I have to check on the sisters. But that is a typical of my schedule these days. I haven't gotten to everyone's journal/blog yet but please know that I've been swamped and have not had as much time to do much of anything. But I will get to you all, and say hello...
More good stuff: The gal pal is back from vacation so I'm a happy guy. This whole thing with my family has been really trying at times, but she has been a rock... such an incredible blessing that I've been able to keep focused and do what I had to do... Don't know how I could've dealt with all of this without her... I am blessed!
The weekend wasn't too bad. Let's see... the city-wide garage sale was pretty cool. I found a 'Hooked On Phonics' set (only a couple of the parts were actually used- the rest were still sealed new) for only 20 bucks. Normally it costs over 300 smackers... got it for Terri for her classes. Speaking of which. Terri is feeling a lot better from the chemo and is getting around again. The only problem now is Lou. Lou is doing better physically. But the meds she is taking for everything is affecting her emotionally. She is now easily rattled and does not sleep. She had an MRI on her back but the doc is on vacay till next week. So it won't be read until then when they can change the medications to a more appropriate combinations and dosage. Thanks for keeping them in your prayers. I am grateful for your kindness.
From the 'good stuff' dept: My best friend Todd and his wife Nicole are the proud parents a beautiful baby girl... Grace. I was honored to be asked to be her godfather. (i'm the godfather of their other daughter too) So this coming weekend is going to be another busy one. I'm going to work at the hospital on saturday, go and work security for a graduation party. Go to church. On sunday, doing the godfather thing, and probably going out to eat afterwards, and then head over to the memorial trust fundraiser for the children of my friend Sonja who was killed in a car wreck back in May. Somewhere in the middle of that, I have to check on the sisters. But that is a typical of my schedule these days. I haven't gotten to everyone's journal/blog yet but please know that I've been swamped and have not had as much time to do much of anything. But I will get to you all, and say hello...
More good stuff: The gal pal is back from vacation so I'm a happy guy. This whole thing with my family has been really trying at times, but she has been a rock... such an incredible blessing that I've been able to keep focused and do what I had to do... Don't know how I could've dealt with all of this without her... I am blessed!
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Update (or is there such a thing as 'Downdate'?)
Aloha y'all...
Thursday finds me feeling a bit rested but still wiped out from the last week or two. I've been laying low the last couple of days to recoup and recharge the batteries. The gal pal is vacationing with her family so I'm missing her right now. I'm a little out of sorts because work has been a little wacked lately. People getting a bit testy. But I'm still surviving... As for the sisters, it's still a bit bumpy but otherwise status quo. Lou has a birthday tomorrow and I got her a pair of dinner theatre tickets to go out if she wants to... I hope she does. I guess it'll depend on whether her back holds up. Terri is still feeling like someone beat her up and left her in a heap with the treatments. And she's only in week two of a six month ordeal with no guarantee of success. But that's what we got to deal with... like the old saying goes: it's not about seeing through each other, it's about seeing each other through...
Well, this weekend marks the annual city-wide garage sales here in the Pier... how does a hick town of about 1200 people use the term 'city-wide'??? But the cool part is that the fourth of July celebration is being held this weekend (something weird about observing the 4th of July on June 30th) and that means the big fireworks display at the beach on Saturday night... woo-hoo...
Thursday finds me feeling a bit rested but still wiped out from the last week or two. I've been laying low the last couple of days to recoup and recharge the batteries. The gal pal is vacationing with her family so I'm missing her right now. I'm a little out of sorts because work has been a little wacked lately. People getting a bit testy. But I'm still surviving... As for the sisters, it's still a bit bumpy but otherwise status quo. Lou has a birthday tomorrow and I got her a pair of dinner theatre tickets to go out if she wants to... I hope she does. I guess it'll depend on whether her back holds up. Terri is still feeling like someone beat her up and left her in a heap with the treatments. And she's only in week two of a six month ordeal with no guarantee of success. But that's what we got to deal with... like the old saying goes: it's not about seeing through each other, it's about seeing each other through...
Well, this weekend marks the annual city-wide garage sales here in the Pier... how does a hick town of about 1200 people use the term 'city-wide'??? But the cool part is that the fourth of July celebration is being held this weekend (something weird about observing the 4th of July on June 30th) and that means the big fireworks display at the beach on Saturday night... woo-hoo...
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Trying To Keep Up...
Hey kids,
Hope you all are enjoying the summer. So far it's been a bit of an adventure for yours truly. But you all have responded with prayers and hopes for good things for me and my family who (like me) are stunned by the response of so many kind hearted (no longer) strangers who have taken me and my family in and have reached out to us in such a wonderful and prayerful way... again, this chirpy, loud-mouth from NW Ohio/SE Michigan (as in right on the border)... is speechless. As for the sisters: well, baby steps would be the proper term. Lou is progressing very well. She's able to take steps without the aid of a walker or wheelchair and the only thing really giving her trouble right now is her back. It's been aching lots but right now she has color back in her face instead of looking deathly pale... But she tires easily and everything takes her a long period of time to do...
Terri is not sure how her treatments are working but she's in a lot of pain and discomfort and any physical exertion wipes her out. I went today after church to see them and ended up running all over town to get stuff they needed for around the house etc... and to top it off, I can tell they are both starting to irritate each other a wee bit because they have to rely on family members to help them and when we don't do things exactly as they normally do them... well... the attempt to stifle their disdain or disappointment is not well hidden... no poker faces here... :) But I understand that it's just the frustration of having to deal with such a crappy situation and a freakin' disease that kicks your butt and every other part of the human body. So I try to let it roll off my back and have been successful for the most part. When I'm not, I try not to be around them so I don't take out any frustrations I have on them. But my frustrations don't hold a candle to theirs, so I am working at trying to keep things in their proper prospective.
Hope you all are enjoying the summer. So far it's been a bit of an adventure for yours truly. But you all have responded with prayers and hopes for good things for me and my family who (like me) are stunned by the response of so many kind hearted (no longer) strangers who have taken me and my family in and have reached out to us in such a wonderful and prayerful way... again, this chirpy, loud-mouth from NW Ohio/SE Michigan (as in right on the border)... is speechless. As for the sisters: well, baby steps would be the proper term. Lou is progressing very well. She's able to take steps without the aid of a walker or wheelchair and the only thing really giving her trouble right now is her back. It's been aching lots but right now she has color back in her face instead of looking deathly pale... But she tires easily and everything takes her a long period of time to do...
Terri is not sure how her treatments are working but she's in a lot of pain and discomfort and any physical exertion wipes her out. I went today after church to see them and ended up running all over town to get stuff they needed for around the house etc... and to top it off, I can tell they are both starting to irritate each other a wee bit because they have to rely on family members to help them and when we don't do things exactly as they normally do them... well... the attempt to stifle their disdain or disappointment is not well hidden... no poker faces here... :) But I understand that it's just the frustration of having to deal with such a crappy situation and a freakin' disease that kicks your butt and every other part of the human body. So I try to let it roll off my back and have been successful for the most part. When I'm not, I try not to be around them so I don't take out any frustrations I have on them. But my frustrations don't hold a candle to theirs, so I am working at trying to keep things in their proper prospective.
Wednesday, June 20, 2007
Back At It Again...
Howdy,
Well, tuesday was a day that started out very lousy, but ended quite nicely. I was not having a good day at work with some lady who didn't know me, right out of the blue, call me a f'ing imbecile. Maybe she had talked to my ex-girlfriend...lol... Anyway, it was just nutty because people were really in a snotty mood and just being nasty. I was trying to remain in a decent mood but was losing the battle... until I got to talk to the gal pal. Things started to straighten themselves out then. Much needed and I felt a whole lot better. I needed to get an attitude adjustment before I went to see Terri and Lou. I knew that they were both going to be feeling pretty bad. I knew it was early, but the girls actually weren't as bad as I expected. The day after is usually worse but for the type of treatment Terri was going through, I knew it was going to whip her. I get there and walk in and while she looked a little pale, she was resting on her bed, reading the paper. Lou was also there, laying down and taking it easy. I was surprised a little but just smiled and asked how it was going. Terri was feeling very weak, but offered up a 'better than I was earlier' so I took that as a positive sign. It's only the first day and I didn't want to build it up and try to make it more than it was... still, she was wobbly in walking to the bathroom but navigated herself reasonably well. I know the next couple of weeks are going to be brutal, but that's up to God and Terri's attitude...
As for me, I'm just kind of quiet and not really sure how to handle things. I'm feeling not so much confidence as I am trusting in God. I'm not going to shout that He'll do this or that... but I believe in Him no matter what happens. I love Him and pray that His Mercy and Grace is on my family...
Well, tuesday was a day that started out very lousy, but ended quite nicely. I was not having a good day at work with some lady who didn't know me, right out of the blue, call me a f'ing imbecile. Maybe she had talked to my ex-girlfriend...lol... Anyway, it was just nutty because people were really in a snotty mood and just being nasty. I was trying to remain in a decent mood but was losing the battle... until I got to talk to the gal pal. Things started to straighten themselves out then. Much needed and I felt a whole lot better. I needed to get an attitude adjustment before I went to see Terri and Lou. I knew that they were both going to be feeling pretty bad. I knew it was early, but the girls actually weren't as bad as I expected. The day after is usually worse but for the type of treatment Terri was going through, I knew it was going to whip her. I get there and walk in and while she looked a little pale, she was resting on her bed, reading the paper. Lou was also there, laying down and taking it easy. I was surprised a little but just smiled and asked how it was going. Terri was feeling very weak, but offered up a 'better than I was earlier' so I took that as a positive sign. It's only the first day and I didn't want to build it up and try to make it more than it was... still, she was wobbly in walking to the bathroom but navigated herself reasonably well. I know the next couple of weeks are going to be brutal, but that's up to God and Terri's attitude...
As for me, I'm just kind of quiet and not really sure how to handle things. I'm feeling not so much confidence as I am trusting in God. I'm not going to shout that He'll do this or that... but I believe in Him no matter what happens. I love Him and pray that His Mercy and Grace is on my family...
Sunday, June 17, 2007
Let the games begin...
Hope y'all had a good weekend...
Me, I didn't do too bad. Did the little things: the lawn, the laundry, some groceries... the usual suspects. Spent time over with Terri and Lou... I was feeling pretty good until Terri told about the regimen they're putting her on... the treatment they're putting her through for six straight months is the same type of treatment for AIDS patients. So in addition to all of the misery of pain, nausea, and vomiting, she'll also get the added fun of needing to stay out of the sun and a lot of different types of food she can't eat as a result of this... Plus the usual added attractions of weight loss and hair loss... there is nothing wonderful about this unless she is cured... It is going to be sheer hell, but she knows this and has spent the weekend getting prepared for everything she's going to have to go through... Me and my other family members are going to take shifts staying over there to watch Terri and Lou and do whatever needs to be done to take care of them... I'm really bumming about this crap that she has to go through, but as she likes to say: "if that's what I gotta do to live..." how can I compare anything to that?
Me, I didn't do too bad. Did the little things: the lawn, the laundry, some groceries... the usual suspects. Spent time over with Terri and Lou... I was feeling pretty good until Terri told about the regimen they're putting her on... the treatment they're putting her through for six straight months is the same type of treatment for AIDS patients. So in addition to all of the misery of pain, nausea, and vomiting, she'll also get the added fun of needing to stay out of the sun and a lot of different types of food she can't eat as a result of this... Plus the usual added attractions of weight loss and hair loss... there is nothing wonderful about this unless she is cured... It is going to be sheer hell, but she knows this and has spent the weekend getting prepared for everything she's going to have to go through... Me and my other family members are going to take shifts staying over there to watch Terri and Lou and do whatever needs to be done to take care of them... I'm really bumming about this crap that she has to go through, but as she likes to say: "if that's what I gotta do to live..." how can I compare anything to that?
Thursday, June 14, 2007
A Better Day...
Mik: "hey Terri, what's going on?"
Terri: "Oh, not a whole lot"
Mik: "so how are you feeling today"
Terri: "okay I guess"
Mik: "well, that's better than yesterday."
Terri: "oh I got some news"
Mik (not sure what to think): "okay, hit me"
Terri: "the tumors that are located in my chest wall are benign"
Mik: (screaming like a school girl): "PRAISE THE GOOD LORD!!!"
Terri: "Yes, He is awesome. I know it's going to be a long hard path with the cancer everywhere else (her stomach, and mommy parts), but I was most worried about any tumors in my chest. Those are the worst. But those are benign and I start my radiation and chemo next week. Oh, and I got another little surprise for you".....
Lou: " I MADE IT OUT ... I'M HOME!!! "
Mik: (the one who is at times accused of being completely devoid of any emotion): (sniffle, sniffle)
As I sit here typing this out, I am simply, profoundly, humbled... I am speechless when I try to even remotely fathom an answer to the incredible response from all of you when I was feeling at my lowest. I needed prayer for my family and was too proud to really ask. I can provide lip service, but when it counted most, I just stewed inside. I woke up this morning and headed into work, a bird left a gift for me (hint: he made it himself) that missed my shirt and tie but caught the back of my pants. And I didn't notice it until I got to work. A lady in my office noticed it and proceeded to grab a rag and wipe my pants... (the bird turd was on my backside) I was too stunned to be embarrased at a lady old enough to be my mom cleaning the top of my backside. Something inside told me not to give in to the temptation of getting hacked off about it... just keep a cool head Mik... like you always do... When I took a break, I went and checked my email for a response or two... HUH??? I was completely stunned by what I saw. I had to fight back the tears as I read note after encouraging note. I was humbled to my core... Thank you seems so inadequate to what the power of your prayers have meant to me and my family... But I humble myself and offer the most heartfelt, and sincere thanks to all of you. I will keep you all in my prayers as well. I know she has a long way to go yet. But I'm at least more optimistic than I was 24 hours ago... I told Terri about all of you offering us up in prayer... she wept openly... Whoever says that prayer does not work... well, they don't know who they're messing with!!! Terri was pretty low key about getting the call from the oncologist regarding the chest tumors. But knowing how vicious those things can be... I see it as a major step in Our Lord making His presence felt... I pray that she faces her next stage of this challenge with determination, courage, and hope! You all have given me hope... With a tear or two in my eyes, I say thank you...
With the deepest gratitude... Mik
Terri: "Oh, not a whole lot"
Mik: "so how are you feeling today"
Terri: "okay I guess"
Mik: "well, that's better than yesterday."
Terri: "oh I got some news"
Mik (not sure what to think): "okay, hit me"
Terri: "the tumors that are located in my chest wall are benign"
Mik: (screaming like a school girl): "PRAISE THE GOOD LORD!!!"
Terri: "Yes, He is awesome. I know it's going to be a long hard path with the cancer everywhere else (her stomach, and mommy parts), but I was most worried about any tumors in my chest. Those are the worst. But those are benign and I start my radiation and chemo next week. Oh, and I got another little surprise for you".....
Lou: " I MADE IT OUT ... I'M HOME!!! "
Mik: (the one who is at times accused of being completely devoid of any emotion): (sniffle, sniffle)
As I sit here typing this out, I am simply, profoundly, humbled... I am speechless when I try to even remotely fathom an answer to the incredible response from all of you when I was feeling at my lowest. I needed prayer for my family and was too proud to really ask. I can provide lip service, but when it counted most, I just stewed inside. I woke up this morning and headed into work, a bird left a gift for me (hint: he made it himself) that missed my shirt and tie but caught the back of my pants. And I didn't notice it until I got to work. A lady in my office noticed it and proceeded to grab a rag and wipe my pants... (the bird turd was on my backside) I was too stunned to be embarrased at a lady old enough to be my mom cleaning the top of my backside. Something inside told me not to give in to the temptation of getting hacked off about it... just keep a cool head Mik... like you always do... When I took a break, I went and checked my email for a response or two... HUH??? I was completely stunned by what I saw. I had to fight back the tears as I read note after encouraging note. I was humbled to my core... Thank you seems so inadequate to what the power of your prayers have meant to me and my family... But I humble myself and offer the most heartfelt, and sincere thanks to all of you. I will keep you all in my prayers as well. I know she has a long way to go yet. But I'm at least more optimistic than I was 24 hours ago... I told Terri about all of you offering us up in prayer... she wept openly... Whoever says that prayer does not work... well, they don't know who they're messing with!!! Terri was pretty low key about getting the call from the oncologist regarding the chest tumors. But knowing how vicious those things can be... I see it as a major step in Our Lord making His presence felt... I pray that she faces her next stage of this challenge with determination, courage, and hope! You all have given me hope... With a tear or two in my eyes, I say thank you...
With the deepest gratitude... Mik
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Teed off On Life...
Howdy,
Well the news was pretty grim for my sister Terri. The cancer is not only back, but its spread all over. Her stomach wall, her chest wall, and the prognosis is not good. This was just a lousy day yesterday. It was my kid sister’s birthday and when she found out about Terri, she sat and just cried and cried. Terri felt like she ruined Angie’s birthday. I wanted to get mad because that was so not true. Terri didn’t ask for this (expletive deleted) disease. She wants no part of it. She didn’t try to upstage her little sister by letting us know what the results were. We knew she was going to get the results back on Tuesday. Still, Terri felt horrible about (in her mind) “ruining” Angie’s birthday… I talked with Terri a couple of times yesterday and she is still trying to come to terms with facing her own mortality. As she so eloquently put it: “Today (Tuesday) was not one of my better days.” If that isn’t the understatement of the year…
I was heading home and trying to put things in perspective. It just didn’t seem fair to me. It goes back to that all too familiar question; God, why do bad things happen to good people? I know God has His reasons for everything. But I keep thinking that Terri still wants very much to live. She is a school teacher and wants to impact the lives of the children she teaches. Virtually every class that goes through cites Terri as their very favorite teacher. She has such a genuine heart for children. She gave up her teenage years after my mom died to raise our family and keep us together somehow. My sister Lou is in an ECF trying to rehab to where she can get out of there and get back to trying to deal with her leukemia. The one person who is there helping her day after monotonous day, is Terri. And Terri’s reward for all that she does? She gets this… THIS????
Well the news was pretty grim for my sister Terri. The cancer is not only back, but its spread all over. Her stomach wall, her chest wall, and the prognosis is not good. This was just a lousy day yesterday. It was my kid sister’s birthday and when she found out about Terri, she sat and just cried and cried. Terri felt like she ruined Angie’s birthday. I wanted to get mad because that was so not true. Terri didn’t ask for this (expletive deleted) disease. She wants no part of it. She didn’t try to upstage her little sister by letting us know what the results were. We knew she was going to get the results back on Tuesday. Still, Terri felt horrible about (in her mind) “ruining” Angie’s birthday… I talked with Terri a couple of times yesterday and she is still trying to come to terms with facing her own mortality. As she so eloquently put it: “Today (Tuesday) was not one of my better days.” If that isn’t the understatement of the year…
I was heading home and trying to put things in perspective. It just didn’t seem fair to me. It goes back to that all too familiar question; God, why do bad things happen to good people? I know God has His reasons for everything. But I keep thinking that Terri still wants very much to live. She is a school teacher and wants to impact the lives of the children she teaches. Virtually every class that goes through cites Terri as their very favorite teacher. She has such a genuine heart for children. She gave up her teenage years after my mom died to raise our family and keep us together somehow. My sister Lou is in an ECF trying to rehab to where she can get out of there and get back to trying to deal with her leukemia. The one person who is there helping her day after monotonous day, is Terri. And Terri’s reward for all that she does? She gets this… THIS????
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Life
Tuesday: the good the bad and the ugly... in reverse order:
The ugly- my sister who has been taking care of our older sister from the beggining regarding the whole leukemia thing and being in the ECF, has a problem of her own to deal with. It turns out she'll find out today if the cancer has returned to her. She dealt with the ravages of ovarian cancer.... What misery that was for her. Well, her pet scan showed something that wasn't suppose to be there. So she'll find out today what it is and what might happen. I know that cancer runs in my family (it took my dad, his sister, his brother, his mom and dad, well, you get the picture). I probably should go and check myself out, but I'm scared to figure out what is going on with me. I know what I should do... but...
The bad- My sister who is in the ECF is getting more cantankerous by the minute and wants to leave there immediately but has to wait for the ok from her foot (stump) doctor. I suppose that's good because that means she is getting stronger. But she is also becoming more desperate to leave before she is done with rehabi of her stump. While my other younger sister has been amazing at being there for her, well, she isn't being told of the lousy pet scan from my other sister. We'll wait to see what the results are and wait for my sis to get out of the ECF and see how things play out...
The good- Today is my youngest sister's birthday. Happy b-day kid... I hope that your husband remembers that you're another year older... I'm sure the kids will remind him... ;) Also good - I got to spend part of the weekend with a human being who defies description... I can't put into words how much this person has impacted my life to the point where I am a changed person... changed for the MUCH better...
So while I've got lots on my plate to think about... I'm going to continue to pray and stand on my faith that all things will work themselves out... that is my prayer... God Bless... :)
The ugly- my sister who has been taking care of our older sister from the beggining regarding the whole leukemia thing and being in the ECF, has a problem of her own to deal with. It turns out she'll find out today if the cancer has returned to her. She dealt with the ravages of ovarian cancer.... What misery that was for her. Well, her pet scan showed something that wasn't suppose to be there. So she'll find out today what it is and what might happen. I know that cancer runs in my family (it took my dad, his sister, his brother, his mom and dad, well, you get the picture). I probably should go and check myself out, but I'm scared to figure out what is going on with me. I know what I should do... but...
The bad- My sister who is in the ECF is getting more cantankerous by the minute and wants to leave there immediately but has to wait for the ok from her foot (stump) doctor. I suppose that's good because that means she is getting stronger. But she is also becoming more desperate to leave before she is done with rehabi of her stump. While my other younger sister has been amazing at being there for her, well, she isn't being told of the lousy pet scan from my other sister. We'll wait to see what the results are and wait for my sis to get out of the ECF and see how things play out...
The good- Today is my youngest sister's birthday. Happy b-day kid... I hope that your husband remembers that you're another year older... I'm sure the kids will remind him... ;) Also good - I got to spend part of the weekend with a human being who defies description... I can't put into words how much this person has impacted my life to the point where I am a changed person... changed for the MUCH better...
So while I've got lots on my plate to think about... I'm going to continue to pray and stand on my faith that all things will work themselves out... that is my prayer... God Bless... :)
Thursday, June 07, 2007
Nothing's Bugging Me...
Random thoughts as I look forward to the weekend:
I have managed to navigate through the week armed with a fresh bottle of Mitchum anti perspirant deoderant... My toilet seems a little dryer than usual... :)
We got through show number one of the golf show online. As some of you know, we quit the radio station at the behest of my radio partner because of some fumblings by the station and they completely hacked us off... well, Mike, Dave, and I decided to take the show online and not be bothered by the goofballs at the local AM-radio affiliate. Instead of getting up at some ridiculous hour every saturday, we moved it to wednesday nights at 7pm ET and it can be heard by anyone online by going to http://cherokee.totalink.net and clicking on the listen live link. The link only works during the broadcast. Otherwise it's a dead link. The shows are archived so if you want to listen to a past show, just go to www.greatlakesgolftoday.com and click on the radio webcast link and that will take you there. Of course there's only one show up right now, but you get the idea...
I'm hoping I don't jinx myself, but the other day, when I mentioned the mayflies making their appearance here at the lake, I was preparing myself for the onslaught. Well, two nights of cold air with temps in the 40's farenheit, and I haven't seen anymore of them. Last year, they were all over the place by the 3rd week of May. We're heading into week two of June and... and... and...
I have managed to navigate through the week armed with a fresh bottle of Mitchum anti perspirant deoderant... My toilet seems a little dryer than usual... :)
We got through show number one of the golf show online. As some of you know, we quit the radio station at the behest of my radio partner because of some fumblings by the station and they completely hacked us off... well, Mike, Dave, and I decided to take the show online and not be bothered by the goofballs at the local AM-radio affiliate. Instead of getting up at some ridiculous hour every saturday, we moved it to wednesday nights at 7pm ET and it can be heard by anyone online by going to http://cherokee.totalink.net and clicking on the listen live link. The link only works during the broadcast. Otherwise it's a dead link. The shows are archived so if you want to listen to a past show, just go to www.greatlakesgolftoday.com and click on the radio webcast link and that will take you there. Of course there's only one show up right now, but you get the idea...
I'm hoping I don't jinx myself, but the other day, when I mentioned the mayflies making their appearance here at the lake, I was preparing myself for the onslaught. Well, two nights of cold air with temps in the 40's farenheit, and I haven't seen anymore of them. Last year, they were all over the place by the 3rd week of May. We're heading into week two of June and... and... and...
Tuesday, June 05, 2007
How to Apply roll-on to the toilet...
You know it's going to be a wacky start to the week when I reached for the brand spanking new deodorant/ anti-persperant and the cap is in my hand but the bottom end of it which is the business end of the deodorant.. slips apart from the cap, and sails right into the toilet! Beautiful... just what I needed. I stood there and for about a tenth of a second, I was ticked off, but then I realized how absurd the look of the anti-persperant settled in the bottom of the commode looks, and I started laughing... Only something this silly could happen to me... I'm such a goof.
The weekend was pretty good. Sat in a miserable heat to broadcast a couple of games for TV and then a wicked rainstorm moved in about ten minutes after I got in my car to leave... I have a full head of hair but I still suffered sunburn on my scalp! Only something this silly could happen to me... I'm such a goof.
Sunday, I went to see my sister in the nursing home/ rehab... she is so frustrated and hates it there. Her thoughts: "It's a place where old people come to die... GET ME OUTTA HERE!!!" She has improved dramatically on a physical level. She is able to walk up and down the hallway with the help of a walker and wants to go home with Visiting Nurse and do PT at home as well. My other sister is going to talk to the nursing director and see if we can get her out of there. Otherwise, her care there is just fine which where nursing homes are concerned, is great, if not surprising...
This weekend up coming is the open camp tryout for the Cherokee hockey team. The players that make the cut from this camp will be invited to the main tryout camp in August. The coaching staff will probably find a few players out of the camp. At least I hope they do... I won't be there... hahahaha.... I've got other commitments.
Well, the mayflies are starting to make their appearance. Ugh, I hate those things but that is the price I pay for living at the lake. I know they'll be gone in about a month, but for the next four weeks, I have to put up with finding mayflies in just about everything... the side of the house, in and out of my car, in the commode with the deodorant :) well, you get the idea....
The weekend was pretty good. Sat in a miserable heat to broadcast a couple of games for TV and then a wicked rainstorm moved in about ten minutes after I got in my car to leave... I have a full head of hair but I still suffered sunburn on my scalp! Only something this silly could happen to me... I'm such a goof.
Sunday, I went to see my sister in the nursing home/ rehab... she is so frustrated and hates it there. Her thoughts: "It's a place where old people come to die... GET ME OUTTA HERE!!!" She has improved dramatically on a physical level. She is able to walk up and down the hallway with the help of a walker and wants to go home with Visiting Nurse and do PT at home as well. My other sister is going to talk to the nursing director and see if we can get her out of there. Otherwise, her care there is just fine which where nursing homes are concerned, is great, if not surprising...
This weekend up coming is the open camp tryout for the Cherokee hockey team. The players that make the cut from this camp will be invited to the main tryout camp in August. The coaching staff will probably find a few players out of the camp. At least I hope they do... I won't be there... hahahaha.... I've got other commitments.
Well, the mayflies are starting to make their appearance. Ugh, I hate those things but that is the price I pay for living at the lake. I know they'll be gone in about a month, but for the next four weeks, I have to put up with finding mayflies in just about everything... the side of the house, in and out of my car, in the commode with the deodorant :) well, you get the idea....
Saturday, June 02, 2007
Looking Back to Look Ahead...
Oh yes, the weekend... glad that it's here. It's supposed to rain and be in the 90's here on the Ohio-Michigan border but I don't really care at this point. I'm just looking forward to a little r-n-r from the day job. And broadcasting some ball on TV today if the weather holds up... so far so good. This week was just a weird week. The day job was nutty... dealt with lots of freaky folks. I'm not trying to judge, but... well, this was typical of my days at work:
Me: "hello, can i help you"
Female Caller: "yeah, I'm looking for ....."
Me: "Ma'am, how do you spell that please so I can look it up for you?"
Caller: "I don't know! Don't you know how to spell???"
Me: Trying not to laugh... "let's try this again"
Caller: to someone in the backround... "you know what baby? hand me a shirt. I have to put a shirt on today. I've been walking around all day without one..."
Me: trying not to be scarred by the mental picture... "uh, ma'am, we don't have a patient here with that name... have a great day"... click...
Me: "Me thinks me needs a drink!"
As my workday was ending, I got a call from a dear old friend Heidi. I've known Heidi and her husband Mike for probably 20 years. We played volleyball together for what seemed like an eternity... But anyway, Heidi calls and tells me there is a mini-reunion of some of the former ICU staff from years ago and are getting together at Shorty's BBQ... I didn't have any plans so I thought I'd stop by and see a few friends from years gone by... Back in the 80's, I used to work up in ICU as an orderly. I loved working with those folks up there because we did everything together. We worked, laughed, cried, partied, went on picnics, vacations, you name it. I went to work in a different unit later on, but while I was a part of it, I really enjoyed it. Saw a few faces I hadn't seen in over 15 years or so... someone brought some picture albums and it was a stroll down memory lane. Looking at the girls all sitting there in front of me, it almost felt like 1987 again. When I looked in the photo albums, I saw some folks that triggered some wild memories that I had long forgotten about. There were even some pictures of me in there from when a few of us played in Mud Volleyball tournaments. Oh my... I think the weirdest thing I experienced was seeing a couple of pictures of my first girlfriend. That brought back a few memories. Some good, some not. But I have the benefit of time passing along to gain some perspective and when I saw her picture there, I chose to smile and think of her in a positive way. She's married with kids living out east now. I hadn't thought about her in forever. But friday night, seeing her pictures in the photo album, made me think about a time in my past when things were simpler, but also more wacked out. It made me realize where I was emotionally back then and where I am now. I really like where I am now :) I'm a much more stable and happy person today. But for one night, I looked at the past without pain, anger or frustration. Nope, just with laughter, smiles, and fondness...
Me: "hello, can i help you"
Female Caller: "yeah, I'm looking for ....."
Me: "Ma'am, how do you spell that please so I can look it up for you?"
Caller: "I don't know! Don't you know how to spell???"
Me: Trying not to laugh... "let's try this again"
Caller: to someone in the backround... "you know what baby? hand me a shirt. I have to put a shirt on today. I've been walking around all day without one..."
Me: trying not to be scarred by the mental picture... "uh, ma'am, we don't have a patient here with that name... have a great day"... click...
Me: "Me thinks me needs a drink!"
As my workday was ending, I got a call from a dear old friend Heidi. I've known Heidi and her husband Mike for probably 20 years. We played volleyball together for what seemed like an eternity... But anyway, Heidi calls and tells me there is a mini-reunion of some of the former ICU staff from years ago and are getting together at Shorty's BBQ... I didn't have any plans so I thought I'd stop by and see a few friends from years gone by... Back in the 80's, I used to work up in ICU as an orderly. I loved working with those folks up there because we did everything together. We worked, laughed, cried, partied, went on picnics, vacations, you name it. I went to work in a different unit later on, but while I was a part of it, I really enjoyed it. Saw a few faces I hadn't seen in over 15 years or so... someone brought some picture albums and it was a stroll down memory lane. Looking at the girls all sitting there in front of me, it almost felt like 1987 again. When I looked in the photo albums, I saw some folks that triggered some wild memories that I had long forgotten about. There were even some pictures of me in there from when a few of us played in Mud Volleyball tournaments. Oh my... I think the weirdest thing I experienced was seeing a couple of pictures of my first girlfriend. That brought back a few memories. Some good, some not. But I have the benefit of time passing along to gain some perspective and when I saw her picture there, I chose to smile and think of her in a positive way. She's married with kids living out east now. I hadn't thought about her in forever. But friday night, seeing her pictures in the photo album, made me think about a time in my past when things were simpler, but also more wacked out. It made me realize where I was emotionally back then and where I am now. I really like where I am now :) I'm a much more stable and happy person today. But for one night, I looked at the past without pain, anger or frustration. Nope, just with laughter, smiles, and fondness...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
